Within The Trees

Ronan Victor Black

In the days that followed my sweet little expedition, I found myself thinking of hazel eyes. At first I thought it was because of what I watched leave that man's eyes; but it wasn't that. I felt a sense of familiarity. Those feelings left a pit of nostalgia in my stomach.

His eyes...it wasn't HIS eyes that caused the emotions that unfurled within me. Those eyes were like my father's...down to the four little flecks of grey that shimmered around the pupil. My heart clenched at the thought. I had tried my best not to think of my father since the day he left this world.

I had returned to my meadow, and began to build another cabin for myself. As I ventured into the woods for the materials needed, my mind drifted. I kept thinking of my father and how many times we would slip away for our own adventure. I couldn't help but smile just a bit. I let myself think of one day in particular.

Laughter. My father had the most infectious laugh. When I was about thirteen, my father and I snuck away to our favorite spot. We kept it a secret from everyone, my mother included, because it was our special place. I was such a wild child, according to my parents, that it was thought best for me to get all of my energy out on activities that would help me later in life. On that day, we went for my very first hunt...as a wolf . It would be the day I experienced my first change.

I was beyond terrified. I had heard so many stories from the people in my village. None of them gave me much comfort, but my father did. "Levy listen to me. You will feel your heart race, and your body is going to feel like it's on fire. I want you to focus on me, okay?" His voice was so calm. My lip quieted, "Daddy, I'm afraid. What if I can't do it?" My head hung low at the thought of disappointing my dad; but then I felt his finger cup my chin. He lifted my face up to look into his eyes. Once he had my attention he said, "Levinta, you can do this. I promise you are so strong little wolf." His words gave me just enough of a boost that I believed him.

He took a step back and continued to explain what to expect. The more he described the change, the more I felt uneasy once again. All the same I pushed those feelings to the back of my mind. As dusk began to creep upon us, I  started to feel a twinge of pain. I looked to my father trying my best to mask my fear. It was one thing to describe the pain, but how much worse would it actually be?

I stood stock still. My ears began to hurt with an immense bombardment of sound. At first it was the wildlife, then the stream miles away, and lastly I could hear my mother calling for us. "Ronan! Levinta! Supper will be ready soon you two!" Her voice was so loud, I cupped my hands to my ears. I looked to him again, and this time he knelt down and took my hands away. "Focus on my voice. It will be alright," he said quietly. I took a deep breath and centered myself. The hearing wasn't so bad, but then again I hadn't felt the worse of it.

It started in my chest. My heart began to beat fervently, my ribs were expanding within me. The pain I began to feel radiated to my arms. I let out a whimper and felt my knees begin to quake. "Look at me Levinta. Remember focus on me. Focus on my eyes, and I promise it will be over soon," his voice had become stern but there was still such a soothing undertone that I did as he said. I focused upon the color of his eyes, the way it crinkled at the edge while looking at me. The pain that fluttered upon his gaze as my body began to wrench and concave upon itself.

I should have been screaming, writhing on the ground; but I didn't want to disappoint him. 'Just breathe Levinta'...It was the only thing I could manage to think to myself as, what felt like an eternity, passed. I could feel my claws jut out and my mouth stretch and form into a muzzle. What should have been the worst pain of my life had actually been...bearable and to top it off there was such pride in his eyes.
That night was one of the happiest moments in my life.

As I sat below the oak, thinking about that day, I missed him so much more. I rubbed my arms and sighed, standing up once again. The eyes of Ronan were a comfort, but now those feelings were mixed with unease at the thought of the  man I had killed. Why were they so similar?

I would return to those thoughts later in the day, for now I needed to finish collecting and head back. It only took me a few hours to get what I needed. When I returned home, I put down my supplies and went straight to work. In the days that would follow, I would find that his memory would become my unwavering support.