Half of My Heart ✔️

25 | torn in two

thank y'all for being so understanding! peyton is still recovering from her concussion. we apologize, but this is a pretty major chapter and we didn't feel right posting without putting in the time to edit it perfectly. the updates coming up will probably be sporadic as well as pey continues to recover, but we will try our best!

♔

I spend every possible second by Dani's side before we have to leave, both in the hospital and at home after she's discharged. But I'm dreading going back to college for reasons besides leaving Dani behind.

Dad forces me and Archer to drive back together. If it was up to Archer, I'd be walking back to campus. But it's not, and the car ride is excruciatingly quiet. The deafening silence between us is only mediated by the soothing sound of Taylor Swift coming from the radio. Other than that, nothing.

I try to talk to him, to explain myself, but he won't give me the time of day. Won't even look at me. When I so much as mention Jack's name, Archer's grip on the steering wheel tightens until his knuckles turn white.

We betrayed him. We lied to him for months. He deserves to be furious at us.

He drops me off at my dorm and speeds off once I'm inside the building. I smile at that small gesture; even when he's fuming at me, he's worried about my well-being and safety. But the small satisfaction of that detail is quickly diminished once I get into my dorm room. Once I'm completely alone with nothing to keep the overwhelming thoughts from completely knocking me over.

I burrow myself under my covers, blocking reality out while I try to think about how to fix the problem I created. I finally allow the floodgates of my feelings open, letting every repressed emotion and thought mix together as I try to work my way toward a solution. Tears begin to build in the corners of my eyes as I realize one fact.

There isn't a solution that doesn't involve breaking at least one of their hearts. That doesn't involve breaking a piece of mine.

It's all too much, and I tangle myself in my sheets. My cheeks and pillow are stained with tears by that point, and my whole body hurts from simply thinking about Jack and Levi. It becomes painfully obvious what I need to do. If not for myself, then for them.

And for Dani—the person who I ignored because of all this.

The next day, I don't text Jack that I'm coming over. I know that Archer's out of the dorm for one of his classes, and I can only pray that Jack isn't somewhere else.

When Jack opens the door, he looks like hell, and my heart breaks a bit more. Pretty soon, my heart will be comprised of millions of tiny cracks, irreparably shattered.

The bruises on his face that Archer inflicted are healing, but they look terrible. Greens, yellows, and purples dot his face, and his eye and lips are puffy. But beyond his injuries, there's a regretful sadness layering his expression. That sadness is magnified when he lays his eyes on me.

He moves out of the doorway, and I walk in without a word. I sit on his bed, trying to turn off my senses. I don't let myself enjoy the slightly woodsy scent that always seems to follow Jack — a product of both his cologne and natural scent. The familiar softness of the sheets under my legs: the same sheets we've laid together on, talking for hours upon hours about everything under the stars. Where we've taken numerous naps together. Where he's kissed me and listened to me attentively as I told him every detail about my day, even when he definitely had more important things to do.