Half of My Heart ✔️

50 | swallow my pride

I stand frozen in place, thinking over my conversation with my mom in my head. After not speaking to her for so many days, I'd forgotten how much our talks and her advice mean to me.

Since it was the first time I've talked to her since Christmas, she took the opportunity to explain why they didn't tell me about Jack's role in Dani's overdose. They knew how much I blamed myself and tried everything in their power to ease my guilt, but nothing worked. They also saw how guilty Jack felt about his role in the incident.

Understanding that both of us were just trying to heal from Dani's overdose, they didn't' think it would be right to divulge Jack's secret and pit me against him. We were both in the same boat and needed to move on without the resentment that would come with telling me about Jack's secret.

Hearing her explain that and sensing the remorse in her voice, I understood how tough of a situation everyone was in, and I wondered how I could've been so mad at them. My family is the most important thing in my life, and I can't imagine losing them over something so trivial.

But by the tone of my voice, my mom knew something else was bothering me that had nothing to do with Dani's overdose. Although I couldn't bring myself to tell her about what I'd learned about Levi online and the subsequent confrontation, I did tell her about Jack's dad's death and how that has been weighing on me ever since I found out.

And just like Archer, she told me that I should tell him in person. Knowing how much his dad meant to him, I knew she was right.

So here I am inside the campus's main gym, staring at Jack across the large room and wondering if this was such a good idea. This would be the first time I've talked to him since Christmas. Considering that conversation ended with me yelling at him to leave, I'm not sure how this will go.

He hasn't noticed me yet because the gym is huge. Scratch that. He hasn't noticed me because he's talking to someone. A girl. A pretty girl who's not dressed in gym clothes, so she must've come here specifically to talk to him.

She's probably just a reporter for our school newspaper, here to interview the star forward of our prized basketball team. Still, just to torture me, my mind conjures up a million other reasons why she would be seeking him out this late at night.

I tell myself that I only came here to tell him about his dad. I don't care that a girl is talking to him. I care so little that I'm going to stand here and let them finish their conversation--a conversation that they both seem to be engrossed in, with them smiling as they talk.

I'm totally not stalling. I'm being polite.

After a few minutes of doing my best impression of a statue, I watch as the girl sidles up next to Jack on the edge of the workout bench and raises her phone in front of them. She presses her face unnecessarily close to his and snaps a selfie before sliding her phone back into her pocket and walking away with a flirtatious wave.

When the girl is gone, Jack gets up and starts walking away to a different part of the gym. I somehow find it in myself to start moving my legs, quickly making my way toward him.

I call his name as I approach him, but he has wireless earbuds in and can't hear me. It isn't until I tap his shoulder that he turns around, taking out an earbud as his face morphs into that of surprise.

"Scarlett?" He takes both earbuds out and slides them into the pocket of his gym shorts. "What're you doing here?"

"I was actually . . . um . . . looking for you," I say, taking my hand off his shoulder, not wanting to make this weird. I'm here to tell him something, that's it. "There's something I need to tell you."