COMPLETED Remembrance of Self | Fantasy | LGBTQ

Chapter 16 - Part 2

It has been more than a week since Tasgal had last seen Haiden. He burned with desire to touch and kiss the young wielder, but it was too dangerous to push forward. He questioned how he could have been so stupid, thinking that once he confronted Haiden's reactions and his feelings everything would be just sugar. What a fool I was. Now that he knew Haiden harbored the same feelings as he did it was impossible to go back to being just friends, to not embrace him in his arms as he did in the tunnel whenever he saw him. He can't go back now. His desires and feelings were just too powerful. He knew he could not help himself and a slip was inevitable. A single caress or tender embrace a second too long would put their lives in peril. They witnessed first hand what happened to Yeva'Ahs in Elo'yn. They both agreed that it was not safe to maintain such a close relationship now that Bras fully suspected them. Everything was against them at this point. Luck was never on Tasgal's side, from the moment he was born as the youngest in a family that had nothing to this very day where his life was in danger for who he loved.

Although all seemed bleak and lost, he maintained hope in his heart. His life along his master, Councilman Ameral, had shown him that not all is lost. All Haiden and Tasgal had to do is wait and live long enough for the perfect opportunity, away from prying eyes. He was certain somewhere along the line they will get their moment of bliss. In Tasgal's mind formed a foolish plant, a two step plan that resulted in freedom. First, would be both of them choosing to pair as Ashen and Wielder. This would allow them to be together until Haiden would reach the title of Master. And the second, would be to enroll into the Empire's army. This had serious implications that would put both of their lives in danger, even more so than at the Academy. He often asked himself; is it worth it? Most likely no, but he was willing to do anything to hold Haiden and feel his warmth. Wielders and Ashen were highly sought after within the army, making them invaluable weapons against any enemy, even if it was just as support regardless of the wielder's potency. Councilman Ameral had taken in Tasgal when he was just a lowly colonel, leading a single regiment. Tasgal had been by his side until he rose to general and finally retired to act as a Councilman at the behest of his cousin, the Emperor. Thanks to his life along his master, he knew that the army did not require Wielders to graduate. They were too desperate for new forces when war was at the doorstep of the Empire, and with Emperor Ryel war was inevitable.

Tasgal mulled the plan over in his head over and over again while polishing his sword in his room. The tiny closet that he called home was a mess. He never was the most organized cadet but now, deprived of seeing Haiden on the regular, he left himself go. His dark hair had a sheen of grease and the dirty pile of clothes in the corner had not been touched. All he did in his free time was think of Haiden, and sharpen and polish his sword. Never again will he be defenseless. Ready for any confrontation with Bras or slithering monsters. Haiden had to save his ass so many times before, he was rather ashamed of calling himself an Ashen. It was his job to protect his Wielder afterall. My Wielder. Tasgal repeated in his head and his cheeks burned. Just have to wait it out. He told himself.

The following days Tasgal managed to catch a few glimpses of Haiden's face among other Wielders that were now training on the grounds on the open green yard in front of the palace. He did everything he could to make sure that at least once per day, during the Wielder's training he would pass by them, trying to satiate his thirst to see his beloved, but soon ran out of excuses when once per day was no longer enough.

Istrek was a sharp eyed veteran that served triumphant in the last war that brought the Islands of Ham'su to their knees in front of the Empire. It was no wonder he quickly caught onto Tasgal's lies and added a few additional hours of training to 'wake' him up. This only only disparaged Tasgal further.

One awful day, in Tasgal's opinion, Vick had joined him in the canteen. "Where's your scrawny friend, Tas? Already tired of you?"

"Shut, it Vick. It's none of your business." Tasgal looked at the man with a dead stare. It was a threat.