"Nari"
i had finally come to terms with the fact that me n Dontae just weren't meant. i enjoyed his company n shit but it just wasn't giving potential bae at all.
"Dontae can i talk to you real quick?" I said walking in his room seeing he was on the game
"ye, hollon lemme finish this game right quick" he said looking at me then returning his attention back to the game
"na it's kind of important" i said swallowing the huge lump that had just formed in my throat
"mtch, man aight" he said taking his headset off n setting it on the floor
"what's wrong ma?" he said walking towards me
"i just.. i just don't think this is working" i sighed being straight up it wasn't no point in beating around the bush
"whatchu mean?" he furrowed his eyebrows
"like i just feel it's certain things supposed to be happening once we get to a certain stage. we been talking for what 5 months now n i don't feel no spark with you Dontae" i said
"Nari man this cause i'm not fuckin on you ? cause last time i checked you the one that said yeen wan me to have sex with you n i respected that cause i care for you" he said
"no it's not about sex Dontae that's the thing like i feel no ways towards you even without sex everytime i get round you i feel like you my friend assum" i admitted n he chuckled
"this cause that bitch ass boy" he laughed nodding to himself
"what are you talking about Dontae ..."
"i been knowing you was creeping around wit dude ian slow Nari. you ain answer my call at all that one day n you forgot i know you be calling his sister yo sister? you was at that nigga house then came n laid up wit me acting weird n shit cause you knew yo ass was jus wrong" he scoffed
"on me it's taking everything in me not to kill yo stupid ass" he said
"Dontae i .."
"na you know what's crazy ? muhfuckers told me bout you n ian listen cause i thought you was solid but na yeen shit, on my momma. get the fuck out my face before i get outta character wit you bro" he said n i nodded to myself taking in everything he just said. he had every right to be mad, he was a rebound n i finally came to terms with that. i didn't want that man fr n it shouldn't have taken me this long to realize that. i hurt so many people in the process of me trying to figure out my shit and in the end everybody was right. it's was Key that i really wanted.
•
"i told him ma" i said crying on her shoulder
"i know baby, it hurts" she said rubbing my back
"you did the right thing, now you need to go tell Markeyvius how you really feel" she continued
"ma i can't, he doesn't want anything to do with me no more. i've been dodging him for weeks even tho i let him have sex with me" i blurted out making her sigh
"you let him have sex and you ghosted him?" she asked for clarification
"yes cause it was an accident, i wasn't supposed to have sex wit him n we both knew that" i continued
"well baby you can't control how to feel about somebody, shit happens Nevaeh you hear me ? n i hate seeing you like this. you know what's right so go do it." she said n i nodded wiping my tears always knowing just what i had to do now.
•
i let out a huge sigh before ringing Key's door bell.
"you got this" i whispered to myself i went to ring it once more but seen the door open revealing Key's lanky body.
"hey" i said barely above a whisper
"oh now you wan come talk to a nigga after what 2 weeks?" he scoffed
"...man i'm good off you real shit" he said about to close the door but i put my foot in the doorway stopping him from doing so
"i just need to talk to you... please" i said feeling myself get emotional
"make it quick bro, ion got all day" he said posted up on the door
"okay..." i started
"... i know it took a while n i'm not going to sit up here n lie like what you did didn't hurt me cause it did. but i shouldn't have taken this long. all the time we spent apart made me realize how in love with you i am" i said feeling myself get teary eyed
"that night we fucked, i felt something i hadn't felt in months Markeyvius n it only confirmed my feelings that it was you i wanted. we made love that night"
"and you ghosted a nigga" he chuckled bitterly
"i know, but that's because my head wasn't on straight. i knew i wasn't supposed to be doing that shit with you cause another nigga was in the picture" i said honestly
"but all that shit is dead now, i miss you." i said letting my tears fall now after trying so hard to stop them from falling
"look at me" he said n i looked at him
"i been knew since the day after that picnic i wanted you. i never once doubted us bro. you was deadass my lover , gave a nigga a reason to live." he said
"when you left ian even gon sit up here n say i wasn't hurt cause i was you n Lani really the only reasons i get up n do what i do, i want ya to be straight forever. leaving a nigga for almost 6 months made me realize how no bitch could ever take yo spot."
"it's been you Nevaeh, i'm in love with you. i want to spend the rest of my life with you bro. you jus wasn't tryna hear a nigga out n jus like you need yo space, imma need mine to process all this shit cause g shit i was jus starting to forget about it" he said n i nodded
"okay" i said with tears still streaming down my face n with that i turned around and walked towards my car realizing how far i let it get. only thing running through my mind right now was what if he didn't want me no more.
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