Wolfsbane // Neville Longbottom

Chapter 18: Minerva McGonagall

"Hi," she said after Neville opened the door to his office for her. He smiled at Cassie and stepped aside to let her in. She fumbled with her sleeves nervously. She was going to do it. She just got back from Hogsmeade and immediately rushed over to Neville to tell him what she had discussed with her friends - well, not everything.

"Hi Cass," he said. "Do you want tea?" She shook her head and turned around to him. He closed the door and walked over to her. "Is something wrong?" He furrowed his eyebrows together, looking rather worried.

"No," she said quickly, shaking her head. She was so nervous. What if he had changed his mind? What if their last snog session this morning had made him realise she was a terrible kisser and he would hate dating her?

"Are you sure? You seem a little-"

"Neville, I like you. A lot. I like you a lot," she blurted out. He chuckled softly and took a few steps closer to her.

"I know that. You've told me," he said. She took a deep breath and looked up at him.

"Yes. But I always add that we should stay friends. Friends who kiss." He nodded again. Her heart was beating in her throat. "But I don't want that anymore." He frowned a little and took another step closer to her, his hands in his pockets.

"Then what do you want?" he asked carefully. "Anything is fine, remember? I don't mind as long as we get to spend time together-"

"I want you. In a way that I don't have you yet. I don't know how to do this, please help," she sighed hopelessly, pressing the palm of her hand against her forehead. Why was she so bad at this? He chuckled softly. "Can I start over?"

"Of course," he nodded. She took a deep breath and looked away for a second before looking at him again. He was so beautiful. His kind eyes, his soft lips, that sweet look on his face. His soft tummy, his strong arms, his awkward yet casual pose.

"Okay. Look. I'm really sorry for being so slow - I guess - with all of this. Thank you for being so patient with me. I've just been struggling with what I feel towards you because for years I thought I shouldn't feel that way because I thought I didn't deserve it," she started. He nodded.

"And you've made me realise that I do deserve it and that it's okay. And I really like you. So much. I don't want to hide from that anymore. I don't want to push myself away from the possibility of being happy with someone, romantically, nor do I want to keep you away from it. And it was going well, I was almost there and then last week my sister just fucked it all up for a moment,"

"I don't know why I'm relying on other people's opinions but I just had to be sure that it's okay for me to fall for you and to act on that. So I had to talk to my friends and they reminded me of what you always remind me of; I'm still Cassie. I still deserve to explore romance. I still deserve all things nice," 

"But there's just one thing that to me is nicest of all. And well, it's really cheesy but... it's you. And I really want to be with you. I really hope you feel the same way and that we can just- I don't know, I suck at this. There are no books to teach you how to do this properly," she sighed and scratched the back of her head.

He smiled gently and took another step towards her, wrapping his arms around her waist gently. "I think you're doing great. And you know, books aren't always reliable. We're individual beings, we do these things differently. I love the way you're doing it. Go on. Throw it all out," he said. She smiled a little and wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

"Well. I was almost done. I just- I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't want to be your friend anymore. I want to be more than that because I think we are more than that. I would really like to be anyway. If you still want me too, of course," she said, playing with his hair a little. He gave her waist a soft squeeze.