Amy ran forwards with the fire extinguisher to put out the large fire that had started on the fax machines.
"Guys, what the hell is going on?" asked Jake.
"Hitchcock and Scully saved the day" answered Hitchcock.
"No, you plugged ten fax machines into one outlet and caused a fire" said Amy angrily.
"But I pointed to the fire extinguisher and was like, 'The fire extinguishers over there'" Scully said.
"You pointed at the toaster oven" Charles said.
"You guys, the alarm is freaking out Sharon. Does anyone know how to turn it off?" Jake asked.
Holt came into the break room. "There's an override switch in my office above the thermostat."
"Great. Can you turn it off?" you asked.
"Yes, I'd love to help out. Perhaps you'd like me to wear a bomb suit with an opague visor so Sharon doesn't know that it is I who - " said Holt.
"Just forget it. I'll do it!" said Jake, and he left the room.
A few minutes later the sprinklers turned on.
-------------------------
Y/n, Amy and Charles were trying to talk to a group of civilians in the briefing room when Jake and Sharon walked in.
"Guys. What's going on? I thought you were gonna clear the room" asked Jake.
"They won't listen to us. They're hungry and pissed" Amy said.
"And they all hate cops" you added.
"Would you guys just fix the paperwork problem?" asked Jake. "I'll take care of this."
Charles and Amy left the room.
"Excuse me, everyone! Everyone, I'm gonna need you all to clear the room. This woman is having vaginal contractions" said Jake.
"It's just contractions. You don't have to add 'vaginal' to it" said Sharon.
"Oh, sorry. This woman is having non-vaginal contractions. Everyone out, please" said Jake.
The crowd groaned as they all left the briefing room.
"That was better, right?" asked Jake, helping Sharon into a seat.
"Thank you. Thank you" said Sharon.
"All right, Sharon. Things are about to get very calm in here, all right?" you asked.
"Look at me. You're gonna be so relaxed, that baby's gonna pop right onto the floor, you won't even notice" said Jake.
"Don't let my baby touch the floor" Sharon said.
"Right, right! Because of the filth" Jake said.
"Where is Terry?" asked Sharon, groaning.
"I don't know! His phone's going straight to voicemail. Maybe we should go to hospital" said Jake.
"No hospital" screamed Sharon.
"Yeah, no hospital, baby. We will be right back" said Jake.
Y/n and Jake quickly ran out of the briefing room.
Jake walked over to Gina's desk, where Holt was working. "Sir. I need your help."
"I knew this moment would come, and I will be the bigger man. I'd be happy to help" said Holt, standing up.
"Great. We need a doctor here immediately. We have to get your ex-boyfriend" said Jake.
"I will not help you. Things did not end will between Frederick and me" said Holt, sitting down.
"Ooh, why not? Dish, sir, dish" Gina said.
"Gina, no. I can't believe I'm saying this, but we simply don't have time to hear about the captain's sordid romantic past" Jake said.
"What have you become?" Gina asked.
"A hero in a time of crisis. You and y/n can stay here and take care of Sharon" said Jake.
"Ugh" said Gina.
"Okay, sure" you said.
"What if she's still pregnant when I get in there?" asked Gina.
"Then you'll deal with it" said Jake. "Sir, we're going to get Frederick right now. I'm sure he's over whatever little fight you guys had."
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Gina and y/n walked into the briefing room where Sharon was resting on the table.
"Okay, I found you a pillow. Full disclosure, it's Scully's hemorrhoid donut" said Gina.
"I don't want that near my baby" said Sharon.
"Yeah, that's the right call" you said as Gina dropped the pillow in the trash.
"Okay, I'm gonna go Howard Hughes my hands" said Gina.
"I am so uncomfortable" said Sharon. "Can we please try one of my positions from my birth plan?"
"Okay" said Gina.
Y/n was sat down watching as Gina, sat behind Sharon, said "Think positive thoughts. You're in a Channing Tatum movie. You're in a Channing Tatum movie."
"I don't like Channing Tatum" said Sharon.
"I'm not talking to you" said Gina.
YOU ARE READING
Brooklyn 99: Jake Peralta x Reader
Fanfiction"We kissed, like, three hours ago" said Jake. "Yes, we did kiss... For reals" you said. "For reals, reals" Jake said. "Listen, I know you said you don't want to date cops, but I really like you." "I like you too" you said. Seasons 3 and 4 of Brookly...
