flushed cheeks

(viii.)

"flushed cheeks"

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(viii.)

I had never been on a date before, and I was so nervous that morning. My thoughts were unfocused, and my tummy was all in knots. I thought I was going to be sick and ended up skipping breakfast. And coffee. It was not a rare occurrence, and I normally would not make coffee at home, anyways, but I had debated it long enough when I woke up, despite having slept relatively well the night before, and decided the caffeine would not do anything for me aside from give me jitters and make my nerves worse.

It took me hours to figure out what to wear, stuck between a little sundress or denim shorts and a t-shirt. I ultimately settled on the dress. I never really felt comfortable in shorts. They squeezed my thighs too much. Plus, I always felt cute in dresses, and I could use the little boost in confidence.

I decided to study for a while, to distract myself from how nervous I was. We were meeting at the coffee shop, so I could go to the library and be just on time, even if I were ultimately a little late. I grabbed my backpack from the chair in my apartment living room, slung it over my shoulders, and left.

I was walking distance from both the coffee shop and the library. Only fifteen minutes or so, but I was out of breath and beginning to sweat by the time I made it. I stopped to catch my breath at the bottom of the steps that led into the library, actively working to keep my gaze from wandering across the street.

I failed when a voice called my name. "Kody!"

I turned to see Lucas waving at me from the sidewalk. It looked like he had been arranging some tables and chairs outside under the big front windows. I watched as he glanced behind his shoulder, then jogged his way towards me.

"Hey-a, kiddo!" He grinned at me, skin looking tan in the sunlight. He was basically glowing.

I blinked at him. "I'm 23," I said. It came out blunter than intended, and I nibbled my bottom lip, hoping he did not take it negatively.

He did not seem to, though he did look surprised. Only for a moment, then that grin was back, showing off a dimple. "Well, who knew?" he chuckled. "You're older than me. And Jill!"

It was my turn to be surprised, and I was left blinking again, unsure of what to say. I thought they would, for sure, be older than me. They both held a certain level of maturity and confidence in themselves that I felt could only equate with more years. I understood where he would be surprised about my age, though. People always thought I was younger than I actually was. The way I acted never helped, either.

Lucas, however, seemed just fine with continuing conversations, crossing his arms over his chest in a way that seemed entirely nonchalant. Relaxed. Not defensive or closed off like many suggest. "What are you doing here so early? I thought you and Jill's date was later in the afternoon?" My brows furrowed, and he must have noticed because suddenly, his dimple was on show. "Jill and I talked a little bit about it during close last night. She needed a little advice"

I shifted, scuffing the toe of my sneakers against the cement. "I was, uh—" I swallowed and clenched my fingers into a fist, nails digging into my palm— "nervous. And I have some time before, s-so I came to study." My face flushed as I indicated the building behind me, and it was no longer because of the exertion from my walk. Who studied to get their mind off of nerves, let alone before a date? My chest tightened in that way it always does when I get caught doing something weird, my tummy flipping, heart thumping.

A soft hum came from his chest before his arm fell around my shoulders. I gasped and looked up at him, my eyes probably looking huge on my face. His smile was more reassuring now, that dimple on show for me now that we were closer, and his body blocked the glare of the sun.