If i knew what i had the license to,

Twins of Why

I was young 

I was blind

My mind was on a treadmill grind

Why was life unfair? 

Why was pain my reward? 

Why do I have to trust in invisible world and obey its laws were the unfairness is not 

is not, IS NOT, IS NEVER EVER there to be seen with my naked mind 

I peel my eyes wide too open , too open that I'm afraid I'm going blind to 

White light of nothingness

Void. 

Why? Why? Why? Why all of a sudden took the form of a villian

Destroying my inner peace, destroying my sense of common sense, 

My sense of the world was built like a place built of cards (made of paper, you know the hearts, spades, clovers and diamonds? Yep those!) 

The villian called why shattered them without a thought. 

I look outside my shell, I see souls lost like me, being chased by the same ol' Why 

Soon Why became like the typical attention seeker, making itself present everywhere, noti-why-fications after noti-why-fications. Like the pestering noisy firecrackers and veggie vendor loudspeakers. 

Why drenched me like freezing cold rain. Why made me pale, dampening my blood flow of heat. I should have gotten sick and cold and escaped out of this why-of-a-life. But Why was torturingly cruel, pain strikingly cruel, cause obviously Why wanted me to go beyond why and accept why and also hear Why's perspective. 

But I don't give flying fuck. Why has put me on deranged psych ward. 

Why was an influenza clouding up, why-lifying (vilifying get it?)  everything, my every love, my every ambition, my every seed of existence. 

I gave in. 

I accepted there was no valid answer to this unfairness. 

I conceded to why and kept mute. 

I made a cup of coffee for why, I looked after why, took care of why with cuddles and snuggly blankets. I didn't ignore why anymore, I accepted I had no answer of my own. 

I deconstructed myself. The puzzle which was almost perfect? I re-made it into unsolved puzzle. 

And I saw something. Why stopped being bothersome.

"You don't plague me with why anymore? How come?" I asked. 

The not-so-much-of-a-villian replied as a slight smile grew on his face. "You are realising the two sides of the blade, child. I am always there but your focus shifted to my twin Why"

"I don't get you" My forehead creased. "Where is your twin why? How come I haven't met. . ."

"My twin isn't as flashy as me. My twin is in you. My twin is the why which infused into you this question - Why cant I make fairness in the aspects I can control?  Why can't I be the change in the little that I could do? "