Tim Mitchell--surprisingly competent henchman and high school dropout--begins to reevaluate his career choice after a seemingly endless chain of failed heists. He's ready to get out of the life of a henchman, go back to school, and get his life toge...
As it turned out, finding Penny a mortal enemy was difficult. Tim couldn't say he was shocked.
His lack of shock, however, didn't save him from having to try to find someone Penny could challenge and have a chance in defeating. It also didn't keep Penny from changing her mind about miraculously achieving in one month what she hadn't been able to do in years. No one had the heart to tell her it was impossible though.
Penny was, after all, a good person despite her dreams of world domination, and they all loved her as much as a bunch of goons could love their deranged boss. It turned out that was a lot.
And so, everyone in the lair went along with the plan despite having no clue on how they'd manage to succeed. Still, an attempt was being made and that was all that mattered.
"How about that one guy from upstate? The one that looks like a cheap ninja. Penny could probably take him."
"No way, plus we'd have to move."
"There's that lady with the magic medallion or whatever."
"She'd crush us."
They'd all been sitting around, throwing out suggestions on who would be a good match for Penny. So far, they had accomplished nothing.
"Let's face it, we're doomed. There's not a single hero we can use," Alex said from where he was laying on the floor. He claimed it helped him think.
"There has to be someone," said Lina, doodling on the piece of paper that was meant to be used to list all the candidates they came up with. From his seat next to her on the couch, Tim could see Lina's rather violent stick figures were the only things on the page.
"There really isn't," Benny said from where he was sitting on a hideous pea green armchair—and honestly, just because they were evil didn't mean they had to have bad taste. His leg was still in the process of healing and he was being of no help at all but no one felt like kicking him out. "Literally, the only way we'll find someone with a good enough reputation to make a good nemesis while still being weak enough that we could take them is if we custom made one for Penny."
Silence reigned for a moment and Tim could almost see the gears whirring inside the heads of the others. Benny, blissfully unaware of what he'd just unleashed, continued to flip through the worn paperback he'd been reading during their impromptu meeting. The kind with a salacious cover of a ridiculously good looking man, hair flowing magnificently in the wind, and chiseled chest exposed thanks to a poorly buttoned shirt. Tim would have mocked Benny in any other occasion. This time, he just saved it for later.
"Maybe we should," Lina said, a grin slowly spreading across her face.
If Tim were smart, he would have made a run for it. Tim was an idiot.
# # #
"Why does this have to be spandex?" Tim said with blatant disgust as he pulled at the poorly made clothes he'd been forced to wear. Honestly, he looked like a cheap cosplayer with shitty sewing skills and the only thing Tim was grateful was the fact he'd have one of Penny's old black cloaks. Anything to help him cover up was a plus. "And what the hell's up with these weird accents? They look stupid." The whole thing looked stupid, to be honest.
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