Wonder // Draco Malfoy

9. Extra Precaution

We're all laid in our sleeping bags now, expected to fall asleep soon. It's difficult to fall asleep after everything. What student would feel completely safe after a murderer broke in, snuck past the dementors a second time, and tore through the painting of a fat lady to get to a student? A student that will allow the murderer's lord to return to power if killed.

I close my eyes and try to go to bed, telling myself that all of the professors and prefects are going to protect us. I focus my attention on Martin, and how he's probably with his cat girlfriend from Ravenclaw right now. It doesn't take me long after to fall asleep.

When I wake up, the sun is already shining and most of the students are awake already. I sit up and look around. Rue, who was asleep beside me, isn't there anymore. Many other Hufflepuff girls are gone, probably walking in a group to freshen up. I roll my sleeping bag up and set it in the bin with the rest. Marcus is sitting against the windowsill and waves me over. "I talked to Seamus," he begins. His expression tells me it didn't go so well. "He is definitely hurt. I told him that you didn't mean to hurt him and genuinely were ignorant to the fact it was a date. He understood that part, but I think what's hurting him is seeing you and Malfoy together."

I lean against the windowsill beside him and scan the room. Seamus, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and almost the rest of the Gryffindors are gone already. Draco has a group around him, all of them focused on a story he's telling. I don't know why I'm so infatuated with Draco. I've always thought of him as handsome, but his attitude made me want nothing to do with him in that sense. Has he liked me? Surely his feelings didn't suddenly appear the day we got back. Maybe our interaction on the train did something to him? I'm not sure I'll ever know what goes on inside his head. But I wish I liked Seamus that way. He's smart, brave, loyal, genuinely a joy to be around. He's also handsome, more so than many of our other classmates. I can barely think about how I've upset him.

"I just wish I didn't have to bring him into it," I say. My arms are crossed and I can't take my eyes off of Draco. "I mean, I think I want to be with Draco. There's something about how he changes when he sees me that makes me weak. But I just... I can't think. Feelings are confusing."

We stand to join the remaining Hufflepuffs and walk in a group back to our dormitory together. I glance at Draco, who is already staring at me, and I can't move my eyes away. I accidentally bump into the person in front of me and Marcus has to put his arm around me to steer me correctly.

Once we're back into our common room, I take the steps two at a time to talk to Rue. Surely she's in our room already, wanting to talk to me.

When I open the door, I find that I'm right. Rue's on her bed and sighs in relief as I close the door behind me. "About time! I've been dying to know about your little argument with your lover boy."

I sit on the edge of her bed and tell her everything. Including how I'm mad at myself for ever hurting Seamus. "Valentine, I know how much Seamus means to you. But you have to think about what you want, not who wants you. What do you want?"

"Draco," I say. Not a moment passed between her question and my answer; I couldn't even think of his name fast enough for me to rationalize anything. "I just don't know if we'll ever actually date because of what he said. Also, his family doesn't seem too sensitive towards 'mudbloods.'"

"You aren't a mudblood, Valentine. You're a half blood," Marcus reminds me. "Still not the Malfoy preference but better than you think."

He's right, I know it. But I'm trying to talk myself out of anything more than I'm responding to Rue, but I haven't lied. It's a thought that's come across my mind before. A knock comes at the door and we're told to group to go to breakfast. Everyone is told to be on high alert and no student is to be found without their wand. It makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up to live this way. I haven't written to my father because I'm not sure what to say to him or what he'd think about any of this. I'm sure someone had to tell my father about the dementors, but I'm not sure what else he knows.

-

After breakfast, I group with some Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws and we walk to our classroom. Divination isn't my favorite course, but it's more interesting than others. Rue and I are in the back of the group, falling further behind everyone else so we can talk privately.

"Can I have a word with you, Hufflepuff?"

Rue and I exchange excited looks before we turn, so close our heads are almost touching, to look at Draco. He is standing alone, which makes me wonder how he managed to get alone at a time we're advised to stay precautious.

"No need to worry, she'll arrive in one piece," he says to Rue. Rue squeezes my arm one last time and jogs to join the remainder of the group. Draco paces towards me and continues walking, obviously trying to get me to walk next to him. I follow in suit and match my footsteps to his. It's quite hard to do naturally since his legs are a lot taller and more slender than mine.

"Do you think I'm heartless?" He asks. I almost stop walking, but I know he won't stop for me. We're far behind the group by now and the passing students glance at us as we continue our walk. I supposed it's hard to not notice someone like Draco Malfoy with a girl like me. We're complete opposites.

I shake my head. "No, I don't. Why would you ask?"

His jaw tightens and I can't tell what he's thinking. I'm usually great at reading expressions, but his current expression is unreadable. "Your little boyfriend had a problem with us dancing. He also heard we kissed."

"People are saying we kissed? Who told him we kissed?"

Draco smirks. "I did."

We've stopped at the doorway to my classroom and he puts his hand on my back and gently pushes me inside. Before I can follow him again, Professor Trelawney beckons for me to find my seat so class can begin.