Shatter Me (LokixReader)

Chapter 14

The whole night I am well aware of Loki who has his arms wrapped around me tightly and holds me as if he was afraid I'd run away. His firm chest is pressed against my back and one of his legs lies across my hip. I can feel him breathing against the sensitive skin of my neck and the soft sound of his slow breathing as well as his scent follow me into my dreams.

"Loki!" I gasp when I awake as the sun shines through my window. Rolling over, my hand meets a firm chest and I finally open my eyes, only to notice that the security I felt the whole night wasn't just a nice dream.

Loki stirs in his sleep and suddenly his hand shoots out and grabs for my waist, his fingers spreading on my abdomen as he pulls me against him and moves some of his weight on top of me, making my face flush a crimson red.

He murmurs something, still half asleep, before nuzzling his nose into my hair and dozing off again. It feels so peaceful just lying here. The soft, gentle sound of Loki's breath near my ear and the tips of his silky hair tickling my neck awaken a strange feeling inside me. Longing.

I don't know exactly what for, but it causes a hollow feeling near the area of my heart. I know the feeling and in the past, it has only brought me grief and stress with its consequences. To this day I blame myself for my recklessness and my gullibility that took everything I had.

I swore then that I would never let anyone get that close to me again, and yet I can hear the steady heartbeat of Loki lying in my bed, holding me close as if we were a couple. The realization tastes bitter and I hope I am strong enough to resist my longing and not fall for a man who is unpredictable and dangerous to boot, but I dread the moment he would let go of me.

After rolling my eyes until I can blurrily see the time on the alarm clock on my bedside table from the very corner of my eyes, I decide it's time to get up. My position is becoming uncomfortable and since I can hardly move at all thanks to Loki's weight bearing down on me, I can't lie down any other way.

I wriggle around until I can turn my head around and instantly my eyes widen, when my nose is met with the soft skin of Loki's throat, his chin resting on top of my head. For a brief moment, I allow myself to close my eyes again, inhaling the godly scent and absorbing his warmth, until I remember the original intention I had.

I try to move a little closer to his ear. "Loki." I whisper. He doesn't even lift a finger. "Loki, wake up." Loki grumbles softly. The deep sound sends goosebumps all over my body and I shiver from the effect Loki has on me. "Loki." I whisper again, this time a little more urgently. Why isn't he waking up?

Slowly I grow impatient. I thought he was the god of mischief, not the god of deep sleep. I wriggle around a little more in hopes of being able to shift my position, when suddenly Loki's hand shoots forward and grabs my waist, holding me in place. "Lie still!" He grumbles. His voice sounds rough and sleepy and makes my eyes widen.

"Loki, I have to get up. Bruce wants to remove the tracker, remember?" Reluctantly Loki releases his arms from me and shifts his weight down from me. Relieved and also slightly disappointed, I roll to the other side of the bed and stretch my limbs before making my way to the bathroom.

Behind me, I hear Loki sit up in bed and finally get up as well. I turn around and my back hits the wall when Loki backs me against it with a playful expression in his eyes. "I'm going to take a shower." He winks at me. "Care to join?"

I'm at a loss for words and can feel my face heat up. "You wish." I squeak the only words that pop into my head. I curse my voice for sounding so shrill and uncertain. Loki chuckles. "Indeed." With that, he squeezes past me and a few seconds later I hear the water rushing. What the hell?

Armed with a towel and fresh clothes, I finally knock on Nat's door, who opens for me sleepily. "What are you doing?" She asks confusedly as I cross her quarters. "I'm going to take a shower." "You have your own bathroom, you know?" She reminds me and takes a sip of coffee from her cup.