𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃, max verstappen

01 ; the day i left you

The warm sun Bahrain's gently tickled my skin while I watched the formula one pilots. They competed for first place, pushing and shoving each other off the track to somehow get first place.

I loved watching the drivers and suddenly, I couldn't imagine how I managed for so long without standing next to the track.

Nervously, I fiddled with the VIP-Ticket which was neatly placed around my neck while I weaved my way through the heap of people trying to secure the best spot for the podium, even though the race only had three laps to go.

The stench of hot rubber stung my nose as the drivers sped past us so fast you almost didn't see them. It was only through the huge monitors opposite the track that you could actually make out the vehicles, which you could only vaguely see with the naked eye.

My palms were sweating when I thought about having to face Max again. After our breakup I had a difficult time continuing my life as it was and formula one had helped me a bit.

The wounds were still fresh and threatened to open up again, but I wouldn't let it get that far.

"And Max Verstappen secures first place of the Bahrain grand prix!"

Even though I was proud and somehow relieved that Max won, my heart ached when I heard his name. He deserved to win and I begrudged him it with all my heart, but I couldn't forget what he did to me. How it seemed to be so easy to break my heart once again.

And suddenly it felt like I couldn't breathe anymore.

Charles Leclerc and Carlos Sainz had occupied second and third place and were now driving to their squares.

The mob dragged me to the railing, which I had to hold onto in order not to fall over. It felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest and there was nothing I could do but watch Max got out of his formula one car and pull his helmet off his face.

He looked like always, but deep shadows laid under his eyes that I just couldn't oversee.

Then his gaze met mine.

And his smile fade away.

But he held the eye contact and I couldn't describe how much it pained me. Couldn't describe how much love was still in my heart and how much I wanted to throw my arms around his neck.

I fell apart and I couldn't do anything about it.

Then he came towards me and I couldn't breathe. My eyes were on him, his eyes were on me.

And he laid his hand on my cheek, as if nothing had happened. His thumb softly stroke over my jaw. Several cameras were pointed at us and filmed how soft Max's eyes became when his skin touched mine.

"Max..." I wanted to scream at him, ask him how he could dare to touch me after he had ripped my heart out of my chest and crushed it mercilessly, but I didn't have the strength.

Max smelled of sweat and his expensive perfume, which still fogged my senses after all this time.

"We should talk."

I nodded.

The only thing I could manage was a nod.

Then he removed his hand from my face and I missed his closeness, suddenly not understanding how long I had managed without it.

My heart bled when he walked away from me once again. It felt like he was leaving me again, even though we had nothing to do with each other.