𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃, max verstappen

04 ; is there a problem here?

Edits of Max and I tore my heart apart before another defeat could have done it. I looked at them one by one and tortured myself with the pain of our past.

Under the hashtag #Matti, you could already find over a million videos and I hadn't even got halfway through, had run out of time when my dad put a hand on my shoulder and took my phone out of my hand.

"Stop torturing yourself unnecessarily, Tilly." He stroked the fabric of my Mercedes shirt with his thumb and straightened the collar.

"I should go find Lewis." I didn't want to talk about Max, didn't want to talk about his offer or the fact that we'd never amount to anything more.

With a sigh, I walked out of the garage and set off to find the Brit who had gone missing less than half an hour ago. 

It was warm and our crew had to give him the ice vest so that he didn't get heat shock while he was driving.

After just a few steps, I saw him with a man who didn't belong there and I walked quickly towards the two of them, could hear racial insults being hurled and saw the hurt look on Lewis' face.

The alcohol that had been in my system until a few hours ago didn't make my actions any better.

"Is there a problem here?" I looked at the man under my cap and pushed Lewis behind me, afraid he was about to be attacked.

"Sir, I don't think you belong here." I continued politely, pointing to his ticket.

How had he managed to get here? To get so close to one of our drivers?

"Shut up, bitch! Who let a woman in here?" He shouted, trying to grab me by the hair, but Lewis intervened. He pushed the man off me and the man pushed Lewis off him.

I had the feeling that the rage in my stomach was building up so much that I no longer had any control over my body.

Seeing Lewis like that — so down, so hurt, made me ache inside.

I lashed out and my fist collided so hard with the man's jaw that he fell back and hit the ground hard. I took a step towards him and looked at him condescendingly, my face screwed up in disgust.

"People like you disgust me."

I left him to the security, who ran towards us in heaps as soon as they understood what was going on, and pulled Lewis with me, smiling at the pain in my hand.

"Did he say anything?" Lewis was on the verge of tears. His chest was rising and falling far too quickly and he was struggling to regulate his breathing.

I stopped abruptly, took his hand and looked into his eyes to read something —

But he broke in my arms, seeking support on my body, in my arms.

I didn't understand how people could be so disgusting and judge people because of the color of their skin. Lewis was such a treasure. Anyone who worked with him was lucky.

Max's eyes were on us from the garage across the street and I thought now is no time for your jealousy, Max, wanted to ask him why he hadn't done anything. Maybe he hadn't noticed.

My heart ached for the man in my arms. He fought against racism all his life, had earned his world titles so well but no one saw that. They all just wanted to see the dark-skinned, disgusting man.

But he wasn't like that.

He was so much more. So much talent, so much heart and so much soul, which he put into the whole team every day.

My own tears blurred my vision, constricting my throat uncomfortably and I felt like I was drowning.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, sobbing. "I'm so sorry, Lewis. I'll make sure more security is issued so this never happens again and —"

He looked up, interrupting me with a shake of his head.

"It's not your fault." He took a deep breath, his grip on me loosening slightly.

"There will always be people you can't please. No matter how hard you try." A sad smile came to his lips and slowly he loosened his grip, letting his head rest on my shoulder just a little longer.

"Are you all right?" I looked at the man uncertainly, not wanting him to have another nervous breakdown.

"I'm so proud of you, Lewis. You've brought such honor to our team. You are so much more than what he threw at you." Reprovingly, I pulled at one of his strands, making the older man next to me laugh.

My heart sank.

Lewis was so much more than just a Mercedes driver. He was the heart of our crew, the glue of our group and held everyone together when everything fell apart.

And somehow he held me together when it felt like the world had stopped turning.

In our garage, Lewis was given a lift by two of our crew, while another handed me a small packet of ice cubes and offered me a beaming grin.

I flinched as I was suddenly hugged and recognized my father, wondering why he was hugging me like I had almost died.

"What were you thinking? Why didn't you wait for security?" He pulled away from me, looked for potential injuries and put his big hands around my face. I was so perplexed that I didn't understand what my father was saying.

"I'm fine."

My eyes fell on the screen behind Toto and I sighed heavily when I saw that our argument was being shown live. I wanted to slap my hand against my forehead, but I didn't and instead let my father pat me like I had almost died.