Water On Fire [MileApo | mxm]

26

Mile has been doing some reading. He's not sure what he's doing wrong and he's desperate.

It's unclear how qualified Todd Baratz is but his advice seems sound. If a couple doesn't intentionally prioritize sex, they won't be having any. It will be the elephant in the room. Relying upon spontaneity is a recipe for a decline in desire and likely resentment. If you want to have sex you have to take intentional steps to prioritize it.

"Ahh," says Mile, drumming his fingertips along his desk. "I see."

•••

"Are all those papers so that we can fuck?" Apo eyes the file suspiciously. "How on brand for you." Indeed, Mile never does things by halves and Apo knows it. Apo starts thumbing through the stapled pages. "I don't see anything on threesomes."

Mile flinches. Is nothing sacred anymore?

Apo keeps skimming. "Some of these things I haven't even heard of..."

"If there's anything too off-putting-"

"And you want to be exclusive?"

"I don't want to use condoms," Mile makes up on the fly.

"I'm clean."

"It's not just about that. It feels better without them."

"Okay, and what about you? You sure you're gonna be able to control that itch when we're in a foreign country and some beautiful exotic babe is offering?"

"You're the only..."

"What?" Apo cups his hand around his ear. "What's that?"

Mile sighs and shakes his head.

"Never mind. Look... If you're not-"

"Okay, stop, stop, stop; this is really cute of you, Mile, but this isn't a business transaction. I'm not a hooker. I don't know what sorts of arrangements you've made in the past but I'm not signing anything."

So Mile tries a different angle, one more true to himself. He is a romantic at heart, and lover of all things old-school and vintage. Therefore, when it comes to winning Apo back, the logical course of action is simple. He will write Apo a letter. He will write him a goddamn Shakespearean love letter by lamplight - every night for a month, if he has to - and woo him like he deserves to be wooed.

Faithfully, he sits down at his desk and begins to pour his heart out. He tells Apo his side of the story, no holds barred. He explains what he didn't get a chance to tell Apo in person, that destiny made their paths cross, but the rest was choice.

He makes it clear that he doesn't want to trap Apo in a relationship.

You will be sad if I trap you. You're wild and mysterious like the ocean. There is a certain unchartered side in you that will always be a mystery to me. The part of you that constantly changes like the shifting sea, that I can never keep up with. Even you don't fully understand that side of yourself. That's why you're always wandering, searching, discovering. I won't ask more from you than you're willing to give. If you want to imagine us as star-crossed lovers destined to be forever platonic, then I refuse to ruin that for you. But in whatever capacity you want me, I'm yours.

Then he drives all the way to Apo's place to slide it under his door in the middle of the night, shushing the barking dogs around the apartment.

It's thrilling, and a bit terrifying, but there's nothing he wouldn't do for Apo. What he doesn't have the courage to say in person, he can write freely. He wishes he'd thought of this method earlier.