Piano Days and Other Malec One-Shots

The Ultimate Infomercial Haul

The Home Shopping Network is the best friend of anyone who finds themselves waiting for their boyfriends to come home at 1:27 am.

Or anyone who happens to be in the market for novelty items that have one incredibly specific purpose.

The apartment in Brooklyn was dark, lit only by the TV and Magnus' phone, as he scrolled through random news sites.

The Oxi-Clean commercial had ended a couple minutes ago and Magnus wasn't certain what was being sold to him now because he was distracted by a "Which Emoji Are You?" quiz.

When Magnus heard the key in the lock, fumbling in the dark, he shut off his phone, mid-quiz, and tilted his head to watch Alexander's entrance.

Alec didn't speak as he shrugged his coat off and onto the coat stand. He slipped his keys into the pocket. Then he saw Magnus.

"You're still up?"

"Of course," Magnus said. "You were still out."

"Sorry. Vampires," Alec said.

Magnus nodded.

"'Ronco Showtime Rotisserie?'"

"It cooks two chickens at once," Magnus explained, recalling the facts that had been instilled in his mind. "Or seven lobster tails. Or nine burgers. Seven lobster tails, Alec!"

"You don't cook," Alec said, walking over.

"But if I did. . ." Magnus craned his neck, awkwardly, to look at Alec.

"Well, I'm exhausted," Alec said.

"But the Roomba commercial is coming on in five minutes," Magnus said.

"That is something you could actually use," Alec said.

"I'll pretend you didn't insult my cleanliness," Magnus said. "Will you just stay here though?"

"This couch is not big enough for the two of us," Alec said.

Most of the space had been taken up by a massive blanket Magnus had wrapped around himself.

"I'll make room. Don't worry."

"I wanted to take a shower," Alec said.

Suddenly, Alec was drenched with a downpour of water.

"Ah—!"

Magnus winked.

"Good enough for me," he said.

"Well— that was cold!" Alec said, shaking the water off his now soaked clothes.

"I can warm you up," Magnus said, lifting up the blanket.

"I'm wet now," Alec said. Magnus' tricks were occasionally annoying.

"You're the one who wanted a shower," Magnus said. He wanted to laugh at Alec for looking at a wet puppy.

"I'm getting a towel and changing," Alec said, walking away.

"Are you coming back?"

"I suppose," he said with a sigh.

A few minutes later, Alec was back, in an old t-shirt and pajama pants.

Magnus found it incredibly attractive. And Alec knew it.

Magnus moved so that his back was pressed into the couch cushions. There was just enough room for Alec to lay in front of him. Magnus draped the blanket over Alec too.

"President Obama Chia pet," Magnus announced, catching Alec up with the current infomercial.

"Did I miss the Roomba?"