"Aleph!" Ingrid loves calling my name and I love hearing her say it. "Aleph..." pag-uulit n'ya na may halong lambing.
I put down the book I was reading to give her my full attention. "Bakit, anong kailangan ng Ingrid ko?" I asked.
We were inside the classroom with more than an hour to kill because Mrs. Ocaña, our Biology teacher, was absent. I decided to do some advanced reading while she and Agnes started discussing Netflix shows.
"The lead guy is so fine. Aminin mo, isa 'yun sa rason bakit mo pinapanuod 'yung show na 'yun," Agnes, Ingrid's closest friend, had said.
"Hindi hamak na mas guwapo ang Aleph ko d'un, ano. Anong he's so fine? My boyfriend is finer."
"Oo na, hindi na ako papalag. Bakit may iba pa bang guwapo para sa'yo?"
"Wala na, so let's not talk about other boys," Ingrid had shamelessly replied. "But, I so dig Kim Hee Sun's outfits in Woman of Dignity. I mean the range of ensembles she wears – trendy matching suits, gorgeous modern pieces, classic black ones, gosh name it, she could carry it. That woman is a fashion chameleon. I stan!"
"Hindi ko pa 'yun nasisimulan parang ang heavy, eh."
"Agnes, go watch it, the show's fab!" my girlfriend had exclaimed.
Ingrid Yelen Tan Samonte might be the paragon of faithfulness and the embodiment of a perfect girlfriend slash staunch defender but she's still just a fifteen-year-old girl who's into fashion, Korean drama, and Korean girl groups.
"Aleph..." She brought my hand to her lips kissing my knuckles.
She loves my hands. She loves guiding them to her face to cup her cheeks, she loves filling the gaps between my fingers with hers, she loves tracing the lines on my palms, she loves rubbing her nose against my wrist and she loves kissing my fingers as if they were smooth and not calloused.
"Bakit po?" I asked. "Are you hungry? Do you want me to buy food for you?"
She immediately pouted. "Kapag naglalambing ako sa'yo ay ibig sabihin gutom ako?"
I chuckled. "Hindi naman. Pero, may iuutos ka ba sa akin?"
"Aleph! Kailan naman kita inutusan? Parang ang mapang-api at ang siba ko naman sa paningin mo."
I laughed. "Hindi." I pulled her closer so I could kiss the side of her head. "Anong kailangan ng Ingrid ko?"
"Wala," she replied. "Parang ang busy mo kasi sa pagbabasa 'tapos hindi mo na ako pinapansin."
"Kasi nag-uusap kayo ni Agnes."
"Eh, kahit na, dapat pinapansin mo pa rin ako..."
Malambing si Ingrid – one of her many characteristics that I love. But there were times when I wished she'd tone it down a notch because I found myself responding in ways that I shouldn't.
Since we became a couple, I sort of lived with the phrase the struggle is real because she couldn't get her hands off me—which I didn't mind—and I couldn't get my hands off her—which did not sit well with my morals. I was afraid I'd get too touchy and make her feel violated.
"Why are you so stiff?" she had asked me.
"I am not," I had denied.
"You are. Parang takot na takot kang hawakan ako. Is something wrong?"
"Wala. At tama ka natatakot akong hawakan ka because it might get too much and you might get scared..."
She had smiled before putting her arms around my neck. "Aleph Gabriel, do I look like the kind of girl who'll just shut up if something doesn't sit right with me? If what you're doing is no longer making me feel comfortable, believe me, you'll hear it. Ako pa ba?" she had said.
