Truth or Dare

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The bottle spins again, you sighed in irritation as it stops on you. "Y/n!...Truth or dare?" one of your friends Georgie asked. You stare at the bottle for a second, you've left with no energy to do any stupid task anymore, "truth" you repled, flashing a warm smile.."Alright birds time to make her spill some tea." Marcus shouted, catching everyone's attention. "What is love to you?!" an almost drunk human who is one of your close friends, Brim asked you; everyone's gaze falls on you; some are waiting for your answer whereas some are worrying for you. 

'Love', just a name that brings a sharp pain in your heart. Your breath hitched, your throat went dry, your eyes left no tears to fall. 

You looked up at him, Jimin put his hand above yours; the warmth of his hand won't affect you anymore. You flashed a smile at your tipsy friend, Brim. "Love is pathetic for me" you said through your plaintive voice. 

The people around you started feeling pity for you. What else can they do? They saw your large doe eyes; none can believe that someone like you can also experience something tragic in her life. They were mature enough not to ask you any more questions. The party-mood changed into dreadful silence. You chuckled at the view, sad, shocked, pity, hurt and so on were the expressions on everyone's faces. 

"My dare is completed, spin the bottle again and continue the party, I'll take my leave." You said standing up from the circle. You collect your belongings and walk out of the house. None uttered a single word. It was their first time seeing your dull side.   "y/n'' a voice came to your contact. You turned around to see Jimin running towards you. "I'll drop you," he said. "No need bud, you know I don't drink and I have saved some energy to atleast drive." you replied. "Call me once you reach home." "I will don't worry." you and Jimin shared a warm hug and you left the place. 

As you reached home, you went straight to the washroom to freshen yourself. After fixing yourself inside comfortable clothes, you slide yourself into a warm duvet. Feeling extremely cold you nuzzle your body against the plushies placed around you. 

Your heart aches, actually the pain never fades; as you can't bear it anymore you clenched your chest, slightly rubbing it in case you get some ease. Your breathe hitched again, your blood ran cold; you shut your eyes close not wanting to witness any stupid imagination around you; you bit your lower lip and clenched your chest hard. You started inhaling deep and heavy breaths. Not bearing it anymore, you stood up from the bed and walked towards your closet, taking out a shining black leather diary.

"Diary! Diary! It's been 12 months already; it is over now. Is it really over now? If yes, why does it hurt so much? Should I-I cry? or shall I start digging blades again? Diary! Diary! Answer me please; talk to me, diary! Talk to me, 
please." 

You wrote in your diary and waited for your diary to talk with you. After getting no response, you threw your pen harshly on the ground. "DIARY! TALK TO ME!! I NEED TO HEAR YOUR VOICE!" you shouted. Still no response. You sighed, the pain inside your heart is increasing. You went to your washroom and took out the blade. You looked at your reflection in the mirror. "Hey, friend, glad you're back again! I am here to be friends with you. I am sliding this shiny ornament again on my skin. It will help right?" you said at your reflection.. You smiled so did your reflection..

You lose your pants and let it slide down to your ankle, sitting down on the cold floor you pressed the shiny silver ornament against your thigh's skin. You press the tip until it digs down inside the flesh, you slide it down, feeling the warm red liquid running down your skin, satisfies you; you did it again just beside the previous one; a smile crept on your lips after finally feeling the warmth you needed for a very long time.

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