The Cost of Conjuring: A Bargain Beyond Blood

20. What the hell is his problem?

It's easy to find a building with an intact roof to break into. It's harder to draw the circle with wet chalk following instructions from a drenched and half-burned book. I still manage, although the lines and symbols are a bit uneven because my hand is shaking. The fire in my head has cooled like my body and fuels a fierce competition between different revenge scenarios. Turning Li into something so ugly no one will be able to look at him is still at the top.

I put the stone in the middle of the circle. This time I've taken no shortcuts. Even if the spell is so much simpler than the summoning and teleportation. I have two layers solely dedicated to protection against interference as well as dampers and stabilizers. I should be absolutely safe.

Now I just have to calm down enough to actually do the spell.

I move to the middle of the circle, watching the symbols light up, and close my eyes.

The air is damp and stale as I breathe it in, smelling of wet dust and something oily.

My eyes burn and my throat closes up as I try to let go of the anger, my brain playing Cera's words on repeat. Three weeks. They've been fooling me for three weeks, making plans behind my back. Probably laughing at how much of a gullible idiot I am.

Cera knows I hate Li, she knows it, and still, she told him all my secrets knowing he would use them to bed me.

I bite my lower lip, trying to keep the sob in. I can come back here and cry when I've moved the books and checked on Grandma.

An eternity of deep breaths later I'm finally calm enough to find the magic and lure it inside. Even with all the extra stuff on the circle it hits hard, much harder than the Phoria. My blood sings and my frozen body warms like I'm lowered into the perfect temperate bath. All thoughts of Cera and Li vanish. I don't care about them. They can do whatever they want. I don't need them.

I lose track of time as magic fills me up, letting it erase every trace of guilt, shame, hurt, pain, and anger.

Slowly and with more precision than is necessary I follow the vague instructions in the wet book and bring up an image of myself.

Pale skin, red hair, cheeks too hollow, and a face that looks like it has never smiled. In my mind, I'm wearing my coat. I really miss my coat.

Then I make myself disappear.

My skin tingles as the effects of the spell wash over me, covering me in magic. From the top of my head to my feet. It's disorienting. Like gravity can't decide which way to pull.

Magic swirls around me in a hot wind, drying my clothes and hair as it lifts them.

I've never done the active form of this spell before so I have no idea what the backlash will be. The books never say.

I relax and let the magic surround me and fill me with warm rightness as I shift it into the spell.

Maybe I should just let go, let the magic consume me. It sounds better than rotting away in a cell never able to feel like this again. No one would care. I could—

"Levi?"

Li's voice effectively snaps me out of the warm cocoon of self-pity and I cut off the magic, completely forgetting he can't see me. How the fuck did he find me? He looks as confused as I feel.

"I see the circle, I know you're in here."

I stagger but manage to stay upright, which is a nice change. Thanks to the simplicity of the spell and the protection on the circle I feel remarkably good. Seeing Li's face and remembering Cera's betrayal is way worse than any physical state I could end up in.

Li is looking right at me but I don't think he sees me. Looking down on my body the only thing I see is the circle on the floor. I am very concealed.

The rain is thrumming on the roof and I back out of the circle as silently as I can. I should just leave. But like a healing wound, I can't resist picking at it.

"What do you want?"

He frowns and searches the air above the circle. The spell is really good if it conceals me even after giving up my position. Maybe not surprising considering how much magic I poured into it.

"Where are you?"

I stay silent, reveling in his obvious discomfort.

His face changes into a very un-Li-like expression.

"I'm... sorry. I misunderstood. With Alice. I overreacted." It seems to hurt him a lot to say that. Like the words are ripped from his flesh leaving him bleeding on the dusty floor.

"You think?"

His face changes back to his usual cold mask in a heartbeat.

"Can you cut me some slack? I'm trying to help."

"Why? What do you want?" I ask again. "You know what asexual means, right?"

I know he does, he wouldn't have looked as horrified when I told him if he didn't. Why does that have to hurt?

"It's not safe to leave. Every officer in the city is looking for you."

It's my turn to ignore him and I start to circle toward the open door. He stares at the spot I just left, looking intense.

"You have to be careful who you trust," he continues.

No shit.

"Do you really think your Grandma, the formidable Magician Vera Starborn, just left her most dangerous and precious book of spells lying around in a house full of children?"

Cold poison seeps through my body from a hard knot in my stomach. Cera didn't just tell him what happened, she told him the details too. She told him everything.

Gravity does a flip again and I stumble into the wall, making Li turn towards the noise.

"It's not safe for you to go home," he says, like he has any right to tell me what to do.

"Why the fuck are you still here? You can stop pretending you care. Or are you so dense and pathetic you'll keep trying even after I told you, repeatedly, I will never give you what you want?"

"Levi, just—"

"And you can tell the traitorous fucking dragon she can figure out how to get home on her own!"

I storm towards the door. He still can't see me but he sure can hear my boots hitting the ground.

"Levi! For fucks sake, just listen, where are you? Where are you going?"

The panic in his voice sounds so real, like he really cares about me.

I hide against the outer wall of the building, the bricks rough under my fingers as I watch Li storm out after me, searching the rain with his red eyes.

"Levi? I—"

His phone cuts off whatever lie he has on his tongue and as he turns his back I start to move around the building, avoiding the puddles.

"That can't be right. You sure the call was made from the club? I want you to—"

Li's voice merges with the rain as I reach the corner and round it. Despite getting to yell at Li and call Cera a traitor, I don't feel better at all. Not even when I hear Li yelling my name and cursing me like he's trying to send me straight to hell.

I'm almost at the station when the ground shakes and an ear-splitting rumble stops the rain mid-air. It comes from the industrial park.

My steps falter. I can see the print on the underside of my boots as they push away the water in the puddle I'm standing in. The rain and quiet resumes and with just a quick glance over my shoulder, so do I.