Two Heads.

5-Promised Coffee, Names and Cammie.

"Sargeant?" Hawes snapped. Edmund looked up from his computer, (where he had been playing a sneaky game of solitaire) eyebrow raising. Hawes had never really bothered actually addressing him before.

"It's eleven a.m."

"Yes it is, ma'am" Edmund replied slowly, puzzled.

"Don't you want to go asking around at the University?" Hawes asked curtly, looking up from the file she was reading to scrutinize her sargeant.

"Oh, er...yeah" Edmund wavered a little under her steely glare. "You're not coming?"

"I assume you'll telephone if you find anything?" Hawes answered his question with another question.

"Yeah" Edmund muttered, shutting down the computer and getting up.

"Are you sure you aren't coming, ma'am?" he added, as he headed to the door, grabbing his jacket. "What happens if I mess up?"

"Hopefully, they'll fire you" Hawes replied bluntly, and Edmund suddenly got the feeling she had been waiting to give him this lecture for some time.

"You see, filing complaints and...encouraging sargeants into quitting is all well and good, but it does get a little boring" she explained, leaning casually back and knitting her fingers on her stomach. "I reckoned since you're number eight I'd switch it up a bit. Let them do the firing."

She sneered contentedly. Edmund sniffed, fighting down the urge to throw something and instead mimicking Hawes' sneer back at her.

"Well, sorry to hear you're struggling to find reasons to get rid of me" he replied civilly. "Cos that's what you mean by that, isn't it? You can see I'm not planning on quitting, and you can't find anything else I'm doing wrong" he added, tempo rising as he hit his stride. "So you're getting someone else to get rid of me. I have to say, unraveling all that mess is rather tricky, but frankly, ma'am, I'm flattered. I'll call if anything comes up."

And, feeling on top of the world, Edmund walked out. He literally had to hold in the impromptu dancing that seemed determined to break out of his system as he made his way down the corridor. Although he knew that by the time he was back in office he would probably be packing his bags, to be honest, he didn't care. Nasty old cow deserved it.

He biked over to the university in record time, chaining his bike to the rack and springing up the steps, looking around for the porter's office. Having spotted it, he walked confidently over.

"Can I help?" a balding older man with an awkward goatee asked.

"Um, yeah" Edmund replied, trying to sound like he knew what he was doing. "Detective Sargeant Gray, Oxfordshire Police. Hate to be a bother, but I've got a couple of quick questions for a couple of people. Do you mind?"

He held up his I.D card for the man to see, the man who Edmund assumed was the porter. The reaction he got was surprising.

"Did you get a call?" the porter asked suspiciously, his whole face closing up like he had something to hide.

"No?" Edmund said honestly. The porter's already rather bushy eyebrow shot up.

"You're here on another matter?" he asked confusedly.

"Sir" Edmund began. "If there's a something you wish to inform the police about, I'll do just as well as any other officer."

"Just as well you...er, came, then, Detective Inspector" the porter mumbled quickly. "I'll take you down to the Dean's office right away."

"Just a sargeant, sir" Edmund corrected cheerfully, brain on shutdown and mouth on autopilot. "But, if you wouldn't mind, the Dean sounds like just the person to answer my few questions..."