Chapter 5: Scarlet's Choice

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The stars are the only things that remain predictable in my life. They may burn out and be replaced, but there are always a few million around for me to stare at while I attempt to order my thoughts. I remember all the wonderful things they have played witness to, and all the things that have been hidden from them.

During the wars of the Immortals and the wars of the humans, all the bloodshed could be hidden under their nightly vigil. I could not precisely recall which constellations to follow to reach my old homes, but if I could find just one, it would be easy from there.

Due to the pollution of the humans, it was almost impossible to see the night sky, unless you were in a magically protected place. Or Siberia. Staring up at them, I can't help but wonder how to fix the one problem I've had since I was old enough to notice them. My curse had made living unbearable, but knowing nothing could end it heightened the anguish.

Hades had known precisely what would bring me the most pain, and he gained a sense if glee in the aspect of his constant involvement. I rest my head on my knees and sigh.

"Anymore sighing and I'll have to hug you," Cassy jokes. I smile weakly and wait for her to sit next to me. "So why are you all the way up here on your last night in the realm?"

"I'm trying to figure out what is left of my life," I say, angling my head so I can look at her. She is practically glowing; I forgot what fairies could be like when they were in love. "Niall is really lucky to have you."

"Remember when we would sit up here to escape from Morgana, and we'd talk for hours planning the rest of our lives?" she says, looking up. I sigh again and she hugs me.

"Don't give up on Ian, Scar, he's meant for you, I've seen it." Damn these fairies and their stupid visions. "I saw you smiling and laughing, Scar, in his arms. We both know that there is no other interpretation."

I sigh before I speak, "I don't want him to have to give up anything for me, or to feel like he has to experience things with me in tow. I want him to experience life, Cass; he's too young for what we know." She turns and looks at me with her eyebrow raised. "Are you sure it's just about his future, or are your insecurities coming through again?"

"What if Hades does to him what he did to all the others?"

"He would kill his own son, just to spite you? I'd love to see what Hecate does to him if he tries," we both laugh. The First Mage may seem gentle and cold, but I strongly advise you not to cross her, the things she can come up with are more than surprising. She makes the ancient gods seem like insignificant children in comparisons of power. She buried an entire town in lava once, just because some idiot hunted and brutally murdered one of her people.

"You know, I actually feel better now, Cass. Thank you," we rise simultaneously and she hugs me again. "But I'm still not helping with wedding planning. She sighs in mock frustration, "Then you can't complain at what I choose for your dress."

"We both know you wouldn't make me look ridiculous, I'd ruin your entire wedding", I grin at her.

***

As I walk back to my room, I think back to Alexis, Henry, Gaius, Declan, Alistair, and Gabriel... Many of them had died, as they formed a loophole to my curse. In being capable of loving, I had broken away from Hades' mandate. And he was not one to give up so easily. Each and every time he learned of my amorous intentions, he hunted my 'boyfriends' down and murdered them cruelly, usually in my presence. His messages were always clear, in denying Tristan; you deny this man his life.

The pain and regret lead to centuries between those men who had brought me a measure of happiness. When they died, I was inconsolable. I would show symptoms of what are now known as 'suicidal tendencies'. For someone who couldn't die, I had a lot of creativity when it came down to the actual method.

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