2:56 :: h.s

vingt trois

18:57

I convinced my father to get me a plane ticket to Oregon because I'm so tired of his shit.
This entire week we've had awkward dinners and about a hundred arguments.
I'm supposed to drive back home with my father on Saturday morning.
I can't be around him for three more days, let alone a fucking sixteen hour car ride.
My flight leaves tomorrow morning at nine and I feel blessed.

Nick, Cody, and Will decided to throw me a 'proper going away party', as they called it.
And this party is at my house, which makes absolutely no sense to me.
Apparently all of my friends are going to be here along with random people from our school.

Typical.

I mess with my hair, trying to make it stand like it normally does.
I give up and just run my fingers up through it.
I find a greenish-tan beanie and throw it over my head.
It doesn't look too bad with my grey t-shirt.
I shrug and head downstairs.
My father is out for the night, not like I give a shit.
But it's good to know that when he gets home, I won't be.

::

23:14

Everyone began to arrive at eight.
Music is blaring throughout the house, different songs on each floor.
Louis has claimed his ground behind the bar upstairs, getting people drinks and being the DJ.
I never realized how stupid these parties were until I got away from them.

I have a red cup in my hand and take a drink.
I'm the only person sitting on this couch that isn't making out with someone.
The people next to be begin taking their clothes off.
I grab the guy's arm and throw it off of the girl's waist.

"What the hell?" The annoying brunette shouts.

"Have some fucking decency! Both of you!" I yell and walk outside.

The pool is full of people and I don't understand why.
Yeah, it's a heated pool but the air is chilly.
Why would you want to get in a pool when you'd just have to get out and be cold?

I would have much rather spent this week at my mom's with Rae.
We would have taken walks deeper into the woods.
I would make popcorn, and she would laugh when the pieces she threw at me would fall on the floor.
We could have watched movies.
She'd tell me more stories about when she was alive and I'd play with her hands even though she wouldn't feel it.

God, I wish I could see her.

"Hey," a female voice snaps me from my thoughts.

I turn to look at her slowly, my mind not wanting to lose the image of the pale girl.

I lose my breath when I see Melanie.
She looks beautiful as ever.
She's wearing a loose white dress that is florally embroidered, with short sleeves, and a tie connecting the collar.
Her feet are covered in short brown boots and her hair is in loose waves.

Wow.

"Hey," I smile and set my drink down to hug her.

"How are you? How is Oregon?" She beams.

"I'm great. And Oregon is quite amazing, actually."

"That's awesome, I'm so glad you're going well. I've missed having you around," her voice is shy.

I just nod and we don't speak.
After a few moments, I feel two arms wrap around my neck.
Melanie's lips move against mine and my stomach turns.

The last time I kissed a girl was the night before I moved.
Melanie came over to wish me a goodbye and we ended up sleeping together.
We've done it before but that time wasn't like the others.
I was never really emotionally invested into my relationship with Melanie but that night felt like goodbye.
And honestly, I had hoped to keep it that way.

One thing leads to another, and we end up in my bedroom.