Never Worry About Me

Chapter 9: Reminiscence

I neatly hung the green dress in my closet and then jumped into a lying position on my bed. I started thinking about what Ms. Hale had told me on the sticky note. Maybe she was right. Maybe I was missing something, and my dreams were trying to give me a message that my conscious self seemed to have forgotten.

Let's see. In my last dream, my dad practically blamed me for my mother's death, and, for some reason, I was vulnerable and had believed it to be a possibility. I knew I did not cause her death. She had never shown any signs that I was stressing her out. In fact, she complimented my easiness and for always following her directions and rules. I didn't give her any problems.

So, what was I missing? How come my mind felt the need to put me in such a strange place?

And, just when my mind felt like exploding from the torturing thoughts of my mother's death and my dad accusing, Katherine sent an angelic touch my way in which saved me and gave me comfort. She managed to be my guardian angel even in my dreams.

I smiled as I thought about her essence and how she made me feel so at ease when she was near. There was something about her that would always make my heart flutter with excitement. I then remembered the pictures we took the night we went out together, and I was intrigued to look back at them, I rushed out of my bed and towards the handbag that I had them in. I felt the photos in between my fingers as I studied them.

"We looked so happy there," I thought to myself.

I looked at my face and the genuine and wide grin contained in my expression as my arm held her close to me. I then stared at Katherine's face. I didn't realize it then, but now, Katherine's face revealed something different. Her expression... yes she was smiling... but sometimes a smile could be misleading and hiding the truth. I creased my forehead and squinted my eyes as I continued to focus on her mysterious expression. What was she thinking? How was she feeling? I was in such a great mood, and so, I guess I just assumed she would reciprocate those feelings. But, this photo recognized something I couldn't.

Sadness.

"I don't want to forget this moment," I remembered telling her.

And, ever since, or maybe prior to that, she had felt gloomy. Did she think I wouldn't remember? It was as if she knew that taking a picture wouldn't help me remember. Absurd, wasn't it?

I chuckled lightly to myself at the idea. If that was the reason, she worried too much. See where worrying gets you? It makes you think all sorts of weird outcomes that most likely wouldn't happen.

I then thought back on what she told me the first time I came to her house, right before she lost it.

"Angelica..."

I tilted my head up, locking my eyes on hers as I anticipated on her next words.

"Do you know why I called you here? Do you remember me saying why?"

She seemed as if she wanted me, with all of her heart, to say that I did. But, she was confused. She never said anything.

"You never told me..." I uttered, getting lost in her blue eyes.

"Hmm..."

She looked away for a second, and I could tell she was struggling with something in her head. It was hurting me to see her like this, and it killed me not knowing why.

"Ugh!" I heard her almost yell. Though I knew that her sudden outburst was clearly directed at herself, it shocked me, and so, involuntarily, I jumped off of the couch.

I watched as Ms. Hale knocked over her lamp, a few stacks of paper and a few plates- the sound of the glass shattering sounding an alarm in my ears.