Decay of Agony

Chapter 7

A/N: Been awhile since I had depression of sorts. I'm really upset...so I sorta wrote this chapter...it probably sucks...like my life...my everything about me...*sighs*...idk anymore...

😧...enjoy?...

And there's also a trigger warning of suicide attempt...again. so you've been warned.

Lucy felt miserble. She felt angry and miserable at the same time and she hated it. Erza had not left her side, and she was growing more annoyed by her persistence.

From the insights of her visions, Lucy had not been able to find an opportunity to escape from Erza, or seek redemption from a sharp blade. And it infuriated her to no end. And she couldn't find a reason for why she would be keeping an eye out on her. Pity? Remorse? What was it? Lucy couldn't figure it out.

As of this moment, Lucy laid on her side, facing the wall and she kept envisioning sharp blades cutting into her skin, and she kept envisioning the color of red seeping through her skin, past the penetration. And she was desperate. Desperate to see and feel the pain once more.

Every second or two, Lucy would get this urge of looking around the room to find that sharp blade. But she quickly stopped when she realized and knew that she was being watched. Why was Erza watching her so closely? And did she even bother? Lucy mourned over what kind of answers those questions could reveal, and it drove Lucy crazy.

With her gaze fixed on the wall in front of her, Lucy remained motionless and still. And did not dare to move a muscle. She didn't want to deal with the redhead anytime soon, and she didn't want to deal with her antics of why?

Erza, on the other hand, remained still and rigid on a chair, eyes fixed on a particular figure resting on her bed. Worry and strict-like gaze studied the blonde as she tried to find a way to talk to Lucy about the past without making it any worse than it was now. As worried as she was, she needed to tell Lucy and have her tell her what had happened in the past. Yet, she found it hard to tell her as days had quickly gone by.

...

When Lucy had reopened her eyes, she realized that she had fallen asleep. So she sat up slowly and quietly and and scanned her surroundings. She noted how it was dark in the room, and saw Erza leaning against her chair with her eyes closed. Lucy stared at the redhead for couple of minutes before realizing that she was alseep. The blonde studied the redhead for a quick moment before removing the comforters and placed her foot on the floor. What better time to do what she had wanting to do ever since Erza decided to be like a strict nagging supervisor?

Lucy glanced at Erza as she stood up to her feet, using the stand to balance herself. She still felt dizzy, and Erza instructed her to not go anywhere without her, according to a doctor that had recently visited. But Lucy planned on not following the doctors orders, and she planned on doing the exact opposite.

Taking a step foward, Lucy moved her hands to the wall and started to walk away from the bed, and toward the kitchen that had been made off limits but Erza. Once stepping into the kitchen, Lucy quickly scanned where a sharp blade would be located. She stumbled to a drawer and opened it as quietly as she could.

Nothing.

She moved on to the next drawer.

Nothing.

She moved yet to another drawer.

Nothing

Growing frustrated, pictures of a sharp silver knife made Lucy even more desperate. She needed it. She wanted it.