Lyra's Big Change

Chapter 13

Chapter 13  The Beginning of Happiness

I woke up to Adam lightly shaking me awake.

"Lyra, come on, get up." He said in a whisper as to not wake Amanda up. 

"Mhm." I grumbled.

I sat up and followed Adam down the stairs and onto the back porch. This time, we both sat on the steps and I rested my head on the side of Adam's shoulder.

"I really like sitting outside in the morning with you." I said to him.

"I do too darling, it really is nice." 

"Adam?" I asked him, looking into his eyes, only to meet his gaze.

"Do you think I can I go back to school?" I asked him.

"Do you think you're ready?" He said, answering my question with one of his own.

"Well, I want to work on getting to the toilet on time, but, yeah, I think I'm ready to go back. I miss my friends, my teachers, I miss being busy."

"If you want to, I'm sure that Amanda can help you with your day time accidents. I think that going back to school would be good for you." He said, putting his arm around my back and his hand on my shoulder.

"Okay, I think I will talk to mommy this morning then." As I said in the middle of a yawn.

"Well that woul..." He started, but got cut off by the creaking of the screen door opening.

Amanda walked out with the house phone in one hand, she was in a robe and her hair looked like it hadn't been brushed in ages, it was kind of funny. I just couldn't help but giggle.

"Jeremy is on the phone." She said, referring to one of Adam's co-workers. "And just what are you laughing at little missy?" She asked me in a playful voice.

"You look funny with your hair all messy." Was heard through my giggle fit, I put my hand over my mouth to stifle them.

"Well, you don't look so hot yourself now do you?" She said with a big grin on her face.

"Hey!"

"Oh, don't worry about it." Amanda said.

In the background you could hear Adam talking in a muffled voice, he got up and walked into the house, but you could still hear the occasional "Mhm" coming from him. He walked back out, gave Amanda the phone, and he just looked at us.

"I have to go now, there was a huge system error, I will probably have to stay late today." He said to us.

"Awwwe, okay, bye bye." I said to him.

"Bye sexy, call me when you're on your way home so that I can have dinner ready." Amanda said, giving Adam a kiss on the cheek.

Adam then came over and gave me a huge hug and a pat on the head, then he was off to work.

Both Amanda and I went inside and Amanda got me a bowl of 'CoCo Puffs' cereal and I ate it while she sat and watched, having a piece of toast herself.

"Can I go back to school?" I asked her.

Amanda looked at me with a surprised look; I didn't know at the time, but it was a look of relief.

"Of course you can!" She exclaimed. She looked happy, and was also liking the idea, which was a big relief for me.

"I thought you might be mad." I said to her.

"Why would I be mad about that?" Amanda asked.

"I don't know..." I replied, because I didn't know why, in fact, it seemed pretty stupid to even think she would be mad about that.

I finished eating breakfast and we both went upstairs.

"Okay, so I figure you want to be able to make it to the potty on time? So potty training boot camp starts today! Soldier, lay down!" Amanda said with a grin, putting her hand to her forehead. She took off my night time diaper and then cleaned me up.

"Okay, step and step."

I stepped into the goodnight she was holding out in front of me, one foot at a time.

I went to my dresser and took out a denim skirt and a yellow t-shirt with a little tweetie bird on it, and got dressed.

"Ready?" Amanda asked me.

"Yes I am ma'am!" I stated.

We both went downstairs to watch TV. I was getting bored, and was also thinking about my dad. Oh how he would be so proud of me right now, at least I think so.

"Amanda?" I asked her.

"Yeah?" She asked back, with her eyes still glued to the TV.

"What do you think my dad would say? If he saw me right now?" I looked at Amanda in the eyes, and she met my gaze when I was finished speaking.

"I think he would be so very proud of you Lyra." She said, as I just looked at her, and for once, I felt okay talking about my father.

"I really miss him." I looked down and got rid of the tears in my eyes, and then looked up, to find Amanda's eyes just as watery as mine.

"I know sweetheart, but you know what? It's okay to miss him, it's okay to grieve, and it's okay to talk about it. Mourning will always be a difficult thing. But in time, everything will get better, these things will become easier to deal with. I promise."

"Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be having fun, like I shouldn't do anything he can't, because he isn't here to enjoy it with me."

"Now, how do you think he would feel if you sat around all day moping? I bet he is really happy right now, because you decided that you want to be better. Your choosing to go back to school was all on your own. And that speaks loudly."

I looked at Amanda with a few tears still in my eyes, but I kept listening.

"Lyra, I know that it's hard to talk about him, and I know it's hard to go evey day without him. I understand, I really do, I lost my mother when I was 17, it was very hard, especially at your age. You just have to make the best of life though, and talking really does help." She said, as she had more tears than I did.

"I know, I just want to be strong though, like, if I didn't talk about it, then that's a good thing, and if I do, then I am doing something bad. I just want to be able to do the right thing. And i want to be okay with remembering."

"You are Lyra, you're going back to school, resuming your life, you made good decisions the whole time we have been together, you are the perfect daughter, and I am sure that your father can see that."

"You really think so?" I asked.

"Yes, I'm positive." Amanda said as she leaned over to hug me.

I started crying really hard, and so did Amanda. We both sat there and just hugged. After a while, I was finally calmed down, the same for Amanda, so she rubbed my back one last time and we sat up straight.