Lights down low ×kristella

Fix you

When the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

- - - - -

Tears stream down your face

I promise you I will learn from all my mistakes

Cold play-Fix You

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She had not told Stella the real reason she was going to the doctor. She had told her she was going for a routine checkup but in all reality, she was going to confirm her worst suspicion.

It was almost noon before Kristen got out of bed, dead tired after the party last night. Everyone was drunk, except for her that is. She had accepted the drinks from Stella and CJ but would quickly switch them out for Apple juice knowing that if she was right, she didn't want to be drinking.

She had hoped no one had noticed when she had to grip onto the countertop so she wouldn't fall over when she got dizzy..or the way the smell of food sent her bolting to the bathroom. There had been subtle signs over the past few weeks that made her fear the worse.

Slowly she got out of bed and went into the bathroom to empty her bladder before getting dressed. She wondered where Stella was, she couldn't remember her saying anything about leaving this morning but a note on her side of the bed confirmed her theory.

Hey, sorry I didn't say goodbye this morning. You looked so peaceful sleeping I didn't have the heart to wake you. I have a photo shoot this morning so I should be back by tonight. Call me if you need me at your appointment.

Love you babe xoxo -Stella

She smiled a little a tear left her eye. She couldn't help but worry, she knew she was being stupid but this was her.

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Arriving at the doctors she checked in and took a seat, pulling her hood tighter over her head. She was too busy checking her email to notice a nurse come up to her.

"The doctor will see you now Kristen" the nurse gently spoke.

Kristen placed her phone into her pocket and followed the nurse to a room at the end of the hall. She took a seat on the bed waiting for the inevitable.

"So it says here in your chart that you think you might be pregnant?"

"Yes," Kristen squeaked.

"Ok, I have your blood test results from downstairs." he flipped open a folder studying it carefully.

"Well, Kristen, I'm not sure if this is good news or not for you but you are pregnant! Congrats!"

"Thanks," Kristen said. How was she supposed to respond? This is horrible?

"I take it this wasn't planned," the doctor said looking at Kristen's expression.

Kristen lightly chuckled. "You could say that."

The doctor rested his hand on her leg, making Kristen look up at him.

"You do have other options you know."

"I know," she squeaked. "I just don't think I should be making decisions right now."

"Fair enough, I'll send you with some pamphlets. Now let's do an ultrasound and check on that baby of yours." The word baby was enough to make Kristen vomit. This could not be happening to her. Slowly she laid down and pulled her shirt up.

"Actually, we will be doing a transvaginal ultrasound. You can relax, I'm going to go page a tech."

20 minutes later Kristen was laying on the bed with a wand up her. She found a spot on the ceiling and focused on that instead of the uncomfortable feeling of the wand.

"Kristen, how has your morning sickness been?" Her doctor asked.

"Not too bad"

Kristen turned and looked at the screen, not sure what she was looking at.

"What is that?" She asked.

"that dot?" the doctor said

"Yes," Kristen said

"That is your baby"

"Are you sure?" Kristen said tilting her head trying to see it better.

The doctor laughed a little, "Well you are about 6 weeks along so you won't see much at this stage. The baby appears to be doing fine." The tech gently removed the wand and Kristen proceeded to clean herself up down there.

"Kristen" the doctor gently said. "I know this wasn't planned. Please consider all your options and don't make any fast decisions."

Kristen nodded her head.

"I want to see you back next month just to check up on both of you unless you have made decisions."

Kristen nodded knowing exactly what he meant. Abortion. She would be lying to herself if she said she wasn't considering it.

Leaving the doctors office with ultrasound pictures in hand and a bottle of prenatal vitamins. She sat in the car, not starting it just staring at the picture in her hand. She knew she couldn't keep the baby, she was with Stella now. Her chapter with Robert was over and so was possibly her chapter with Stella.