If You Fall

Nineteen

Don came in around six. We were eating pizzas at that point and he sat in one of the big chairs and helped himself to a piece of pepperoni. He was well over six feet tall, and gave off such a safe vibe it was almost as though he had a device emitting it. I noticed the way Reed and the others looked at him expectantly, and most of all, trustingly. And these were some people who had every reason to fear and mistrust grown ups, especially those in positions of power. "You're not like other adults," I said without thinking, then put my hand over my mouth. What did that even mean.

But he smiled. "I believe there are plenty of adults like myself out there. It just seems like we mostly cross paths with the ones who are doing it wrong."

"That, or it's about a million of them to one of you," I said, more realistically. I got a second piece of pizza. I noticed Arianna putting it away with pleasure. She was a few inches taller than me and probably forty pounds heavier, which filled her out in all the right places. I was too thin, even though I could eat pretty regularly now. She bit into her fourth piece and I envied her across the board. Such an ugly emotion. Not the warrior way.

"Unfortunately, it does feel like that some days," he agreed. "Oh, here." He pulled out a new cell phone and handed it to Reed to give to me. "Stay off social media for now. You can catch up on celebrities and cat videos in a few days." He winked at me but I knew he was serious.

I nodded, taking it from Reed. "Thank you."

"Nothing is happening at your little house." He rubbed his jaw thoughtfully, a half eaten slice of pizza in his hand. "Of course, we don't know what this means yet. Do they know about it? Do they care? Are they trying to avoid a trap laid by us? There's no way of telling. So we'll have to proceed with utmost caution, whatever we do. They are now expecting anything."

His voice was in no way reprimanding or indicative of disappointment but Reed slumped into himself next to me. "I'm so sorry, everyone," he said unhappily. "I still don't know how I didn't hear him. I allowed myself to become too absorbed. Careless."

Don spoke. "Everyone makes mistakes, son. You've been untouchable, as they say, for all these years. One slip up is not the end of the world."

Ari slammed her hand down on the table. "No, because, actually, it could have been, for him," she said angrily, first do Don, but then turned to Reed. "They could have killed you! After what they did to Mikey and Siobhan? They sent us her fucking finger! You should be dead right now." She stood up, throwing the crust she held down. She was yelling now. "We thought you were dead for three fucking days!" She put her hands up, palms out. Her gaze settled on me and she said bitterly, "And then you bring her here. No, fuck this." She left the room and we heard the front door slam.

I was stunned. Somehow her words made what had happened real, though my mind skimmed right over the finger comment. "She's right," I said, my body reacting with tremors. "Also, you better go deal with that." I looked at him expectantly, although it was the last thing in the world I wanted to say.

He was beyond distressed. He stood, hesitated, began to go, turned back to kiss me on the top of my head, and then went after her. It felt like someone was jumping up and down on my soul, but I dealt with it. Not so many options.

"So how long has this--" I gestured at where they'd disappeared, "--Been going on?" MINE I wanted to tattoo on him.

Dane smiled sympathetically at me. "It's not like that, so don't you fret about it." He drank half a Pepsi and burped. "'Scuse me. She's all riled up about us sitting for free days not knowin', ain't she? It's the not knowin' as gets to you."