Haikyuu!! X Reader

ii. Kōtarō Bokuto

"Selfishness"

Over the past years the friendship that's been going on between you and Bokuto was anything but dull, as if he had brought and painted bright shades of colors you never knew existed.

And of course you were extra grateful for that.

But there's one thing. The word 'friend' seemed to not be enough for you.
It used to.

But all these actions Bokuto does left you without a choice.

Offered you an escort to home even though your house was clearly on the opposite way of his, the lack of hesitation he showed when you asked for a favour, a strong will to put your need above his, and all the little gestures; a hand over your shoulder, a pat on the head.

These things.

These are the reasons why you allowed yourself to be greedy, to think that perhaps those were the signs where your selfishness wasn't off limits, leading you to develop a romantic feeling towards the glimmering silver-haired guy.

Nights were dreadful.

You started to crave for his affection more than necessary that's before would've been just the right amount. You suddenly found yourself wanting him more than you've wanted anything in your life.

When deep down you knew,
you couldn't.

Your friendship was more than that, it's so much more than your one-sided selfishness.

-

You trotted past the hall making your way to the class, all gloomy. It didn't take geniuses to know that you're sad, sleep-deprived, and would very much like if people didn't bother you.

After what you felt like a long trip, you arrived and slide the door that somehow was especially heavier that morning. It was kind of unmotivating knowing a fact that Bokuto will be behind this door looking all happy, exactly the opposite of you.

And your guess was spot on. There he was grinning ear to ear as he talked with one of his classmate, probably about Bokuto boosting his own ego.

You tried made your way to your table as quick as possible, crossing your finger that a certain volleyball player won't notice you. It's not that you're avoiding him, you were just afraid you'd be overwhelmed, after having such rough nights over the weekend.

But right the next second after you sat, a shadow you knew too well loomed over you, crushing the hope you've been holding  onto right before your eyes.
Surpise surprise, it was Bokuto.

He looked at you expectantly, waiting for your usual cheerie morning greeting that you probably wasn't going to voice. The boy just couldn't get the hint that you didn't want him near you.

Not that you made it clear.

You stared back at him intently, then looked away letting out a shameless unresolved sigh, making it obvious that Bokuto was an unwelcomed guest that morning.

"Oi! What's that sigh for!? I haven't even said anything yet!" He crossed his arms with an offended expression, yet managed to sound like he had all the energy in the world. "Spare me some of your enthusiasm, Kou. I desperately need it." You don't get how he seemed to always bring an infinite supply of energy, and you don't get how it's always contagious either somehow.

But not today.

A sigh escaped your lips once more as you closed your eyes, putting your head between your arms on the table. Being Bokuto, he's utterly clueless regarding the hints you've dropped there and there and didn't leave you alone.