Protecting Cecilia

Don't leave me...

Song: Helium By Sia

I make it back home; I climb back into the window. I must have dosed off before I even realize that it's dark out. He is home, my father that is. I hear his footsteps coming down the hallway and then there he is standing in my doorway.

I run past him to the bathroom to relive myself. Unfortunately Weston is still nowhere in sight.

I fix fried chicken, mashed potatoes from a box and a can of green beans. They are the cheep kind so they are a really weird shade of green. My father is in one of his moods as always.

"Stand over there in that one square of tile and don't move." Of course I do. I stand there the whole time while they are eating. When they are done eating there is one tiny piece of chicken leg left and a big spoonful of potatoes. I eat that and drink two glasses of water hoping that will satisfy my hunger for the night. When I am done, I wash the dishes then go back to my room. I stay up late as possible waiting for him but he never comes.

On Sunday, I sneak back out of the house and walk to the nursing home on my own in silence.

I get to his room and pull up a chair to hold his hand. I really don't know what to say.

"Weston if you are here you have to wake up. You said you wouldn't leave me. You said you would come back for me. Don't leave me...please don't leave me."

There is no response. I stand up and remove the oxygen mask like I did the day before hoping that if I kiss him again he will come too. Nothing happens.

I notice a pad of paper on the table and I pick it up along with the pen next to it and I write, 'Don't forget about me- love Cecilia.' I fold up the paper and slide it into one of his pants pockets that are hanging in the closet. I didn't want to leave it out for someone to toss it and then he would never see it.

I wait another hour before going home.

I climb back into the window. It's amazing how no one even realizes if I'm here or not. Gold figure.

Ever since Weston has come into my life, I've had someone to talk with. Now it's going on the second day and I can't stand the sound of silence around me. I try hard to fall asleep but it's so quite- too quite.

My mom unlocks the door this time. It's already Monday and I have to go to school. I think my parents are a little afraid that if I don't go to school then they will get like thrown in jail or something. So anyway, I have to go to school.

I find my way to the cafeteria to eat breakfast and then head to my first class. It is so boring without him cracking jokes about everyone else here. The day goes by a blur; I can't seem to focus on anything.

Even in Drama, I'm not my usual self and Mrs. Banks picks up on it. "Cecilia let's do the scene again." She tells me. I do and mess up all over again.

"Maybe take a break Cecilia. We can work on the next scene." Which I'm not in so I go to the restroom to try to calm my nerves.

I'm washing my face with cold water when the door opens and in walks Emily, Mrs. Banks daughter.

"Hey my mom wanted me to check on you to see if you are alright." She wrinkles her nose when she attempts to smile at me.

"I will be it's just been a very long day." I tell her.

"I can stay if you want me too or we can walk back to the theater together." She stands on her toes, then back down to her heels and then back to her toes. Back and forth, back and forth as if telling me to come on.

I roll my eyes. "We can go back." I dry my face off and then my hands and throw the paper in the trash. On the way back she makes small talk, I think to try to calm my nerves.

"So you are a junior right?" she asks.

"Yeah, what grade are you in?"

"I'm a senior this year. I so can't wait to graduate. I'm moving to Atlanta to go to school." She beams.

"That sounds like fun."

"I don't think my parents are too thrilled about me moving that far away but hey it's part of life ya know."

"I can't wait to get out of this town." I look down at me feet as I continue to walk beside her. "So do you think you will ever come back here you know to visit?"

"I'm sure I will be back on breaks or my parents will come visit me, either way. If you leave will you come back?"

"Hell no...once I'm gone, I'm never looking back."

"Not even to visit your parents?" she looks at me with raised eyebrows and her eyes are wide in disbelief.

"Nope, I'm sure they won't miss me and I'm sure as hell not going to miss them."

"Ouch!" she gets really quite then says. "My mom really likes you."

"Does she now, how can you tell?"

"Well first of all she doesn't just drop everything for just anyone of her students. And I have heard her mention your name a time or two at home."

"About what?"

"I don't know, all I know is that she is concerned about you, like I said she likes you."

We get to the theater and she drops the subject once she opens the door for us to go in. I get back on stage and try to do my lines but it's just not happening today.

On the ride home she is singing to the radio. I keep wanting to ask her but I keep stopping myself.

When I get up the nerve I blurt out, "Why do you like me? I mean why are you always trying to help me?"

"I like all my students, Cecilia. I just think every child should have the experience of Drama."

"Yeah I know that but that is not what I meant."

She turns the radio down. "Okay...I feel that you could use someone to talk to and I am a good listener. I want to be here for you if you need me."

"But you have a lot of students...why me. Emily mentioned that you even talk about me at home."

"Emily shouldn't have said anything but honestly Cecilia I am worried about you."

"I'm a big girl...I will be fine."

She stops to look at me while we are at the red light. "You keep saying that but I know that there is so much more that you are not telling me."

"Yeah well some things are better left unsaid under lock and key ya know."

"Maybe, however if you talk about it and let it all out in the open maybe things would change for the better."

I try smiling at her and then drop the subject. "Can I ask you for a huge favor?"

"Sure what is it?"

"Would it be possible to go by the nursing home to see Weston?"

"Cecilia I don't know it's already after five."