Protecting Cecilia

Another lonely night

Song: The lonely by Christina Perri

No one is home when I get home, thank goodness. I go ahead and start cleaning around the house. Its amazing how two grown adults are this freaking messy.

Beer bottles are scattered here and there. And her damn ashes all over everything like she just can't seem to get them into the nearby ashtray. I mean really.

Mrs. Banks could have taken me to see Weston but she didn't. I think she just didn't want to have to confront my father again. I understand, I do, but I so miss Weston. I miss him so much it would have been worth a beating over it.

By the time I'm done cleaning my mom is home. She walks in half drunk and spills her bottle on the tile of the kitchen floor. She leaves it there and stumbles backwards and makes her way to her room. I'm trying to fix these pork chops that are super thin, so they should be cooked in no time. I also fix baked potatoes in the microwave and more green bean from a can.

I don't even have to turn around to know that he is home. I know it is him by the slamming of the front door. The only mistake I made was not cleaning up the spilt beer on the floor that my mother made.

"What the hell is this on the floor?" He yells.

"Mom spilt her drink." I tell him which is the truth. I turn and continue to fix his super.

"And why is it still here? Come on Cecilia get with it." He steps over the mess and walks over to the fridge to get out a beer.

I grab a towel and go over to the puddle of beer on the floor. I bend down to wipe it up, another mistake that I make. I should have known better; I should have waited till he left the room.

I know its coming; I heard the sound of his belt whip through the hoops of his jeans and in a matter of seconds before I can stand back up the belt whips against my back. I gasp and try to stand back up but he uses his foot to hold me down on my hands and knees.

"Don't you dare move," he hisses. "Its Monday right?" he asks me.

"Yes sir." A stray tear fall to the floor in front of me.

"And you stayed after school with that teacher right?"

"Yes sir."

"Uhm...looks like your chores are not done considering you have to clean that mess there. Looks like it's been there for a little while." The belt hits me again as I grit my teeth to fight back the pain.

"You know the consequences that you have to face if you don't do your chores."

"Yes sir."

I know he is not finished with me. I can hear it in his voice. The belt whips into my back. I don't bother counting like I use to. I don't even notice the room is filling up with smoke until he walks over and turns the stove off. Great burnt food.

"Dammit to hell; can't you do anything right?" He pulls out the pork chops from the oven. More smoke fills the room. I was cooking them on one of the cookie sheets. He tosses the whole thing at me and it all falls to the floor beside me splashing up onto my jeans. The grease goes through and I can feel it burning my leg.

A part of me keeps praying that Weston will be here soon to help in some way but he still doesn't come to the rescue. I want to scream out so bad. I want to shove him so hard that he falls over and dies. I know I shouldn't think this way but I truly hate my father. I just don't understand what I ever did to him to make him hate me so much.

I'm still in my own head thinking, thinking of how to get out of this, when he bends down to pull me up by the hair of my head. "Get your ass up and clean up this shit?"

I try to pick up the pork chops with my nails. It's super hot and it burns my fingertips. I toss them back onto the cookie sheet. Thankfully he leaves the room then, so I use a towel to pick up the sheet because it's still hot. I have to scrub the whole floor down and not just once because the first time it still has a thin layer of grease.

By the time I am done cleaning the kitchen it's going on midnight. Of course I can't sleep as I lean back against the wall in my room.

The moon is out tonight, nice and round. I can even see a few stars from here. I think of finding a razor or a knife but my mind keeps playing tricks on me. Weston's voice is in my head – 'You are better than him.' 'I will come for you.' 'I care about you.'

I finally fall asleep thinking of him. When morning comes he is still not here. I get ready for school and leave before anyone wakes up.

School goes by like it did the day before however today during Drama I focus really hard on my parts and get the lines right.

Mrs. Banks takes me home again. "How is everything going at home?"

"It's going." I dig my hands between my lap. I know she has probably seen the burns on my fingertips but she doesn't say anything.

She drops the topic. "So how was school today?"

"Fine just like every other day." I turn my head and look out the window. I'm really just not in the mood for talking. The weird thing is though is she is asking me questions as if she was my mom. I bet she has these conversations with her daughter every night while they sit around the dining table eating as a family by a meal that she cooked, not her daughter.

"Guess what I heard today?" She says with excitement in her voice.

"There is no telling, what did you hear?"

"Weston's grandparents said that he is awake. No one knows yet but I'm sure by tomorrow it will be all over the school."

That gets my attention and I turn to look at her to see if she is serious and she is. Of course she wouldn't lie about it. "Wow he's really awake."

"Yep that's what I hear. Hopefully he will be back to his normal self and be able to come back to school to finish out the year."

"Yeah! That would be awesome." I tell her. But what I really wanted to say is that I hope he will remember me.

I want to go by there so bad but I don't bother asking her.

When I get home. I do the usual. I clean, cook, and then go my room. I try to study and then practice my parts to the play but my mind keeps trailing off. It keeps thinking of Weston.