Dancing

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She unfolded the paper, resenting how her hands trembled. Finally, she set it on the bed so she could read it.

Dearest Carissa,

There's a water mill at the edge of the town. Should you wish to meet me, I'll remain there until dawn.

Ever Yours,

Elon

She forced her lungs to expand, reminding herself to breathe. Elon. Finally. She was going to see Elon again.

She clutched the note and flower to her chest and stumbled back down the stairs, the pain a distant echo of what it once was. She wove through the alleys, her feet pounding beneath her. Each step jarred her entire body, making pain flare in her feet and shoot up her shins until she feared they would splinter.

She reached the edge of town, dashed through the damp grass, and halted at the stone water mill. A creek rushed by, making the water wheel spin languidly. She stood there in the dark, the town glowing behind her, music faint in the distance.

A gentle breeze stirred the grass as her ears strained for noise and her eyes searched for movement. Where was he?

"Carissa?"

She whipped around. Elon stood in the middle of the field, his silhouette dark against the town's lights. Her blood churned in her veins, her heart thrashing furiously. She wanted to run and fling her arms around him but feared she hadn't the strength to do so.

Elon closed the distance between them, until a deep inhale would cause their chests to touch.

She didn't know why Elon made the decisions he did, why some were spared to live and others left to die. But she knew that she needed him. In fact, all of Esmeray did.

She leaned forward, tucking her head beneath his chin. Instead of his arms going around her, he lifted her and carried her toward the stream.

She tipped her head against his chest, until she could feel his heart thrumming steadily beneath. It felt like they'd spent months apart. And if she had just stopped to try and listen to him, perhaps this wouldn't have happened.

Her relationship with Elon felt like a cycle, and she was nearly dizzy from going in circles. Her faith in him was continually being challenged, and it seemed she failed every test she was presented with. Even as Elon had proven that he loved her and had a plan for her future. Why couldn't she return the devotion and loyalty Elon had shown her? Why was she so weak that she continually doubted him?

Elon lowered her, and the stream's cold waters caressed her skin, making shudders snake through her. His hands wandered down her limbs, and warmth rushed through her.

Yet when the warmth faded, the pain remained.

She glanced up at Elon. What had happened?

Elon met her questioning gaze and lifted up her arm in answer. Her flawless, perfectly healed arm.

She touched the area the gash had been and gasped as pain flashed through her. "What's wrong?" She twisted her arm. There wasn't even a scar or blackened veins. Could Elon have only partially healed her?

"I've forgiven you, but you haven't forgiven yourself." He tipped her chin up toward him. "Your wounds are gone and healed, yet you're clinging to them, believing that they're your due." He seated himself next to her, the stream flowing around his waist. "Let it go, Carissa. I've already suffered and paid the price on your account. You're doing nothing but causing yourself needless pain."

"I just wished I hadn't lost my temper and chased you away."

He nudged her forehead with his. "It would take much more than a few angry words to chase me away, Carissa."

"Then why did you leave?"

"I didn't leave." He tapped the ring on her finger. "I'm always with you. I was simply leading you to a better place."

"This?" She gestured to the city.

"No, this." He grabbed her hand and placed it against his chest. "Me and you. Here. Now. Whatever happens, know that my goal is to be closer to you and to draw you closer to me." The distant lantern light sparkled in his eyes. "Even if it's not all that apparent at first. Now, would you let me heal your back?"

At her nod, he loosened the laces of her dress. His calloused palm slid along her back, and her breath caught as she resisted the urge to lean into his touch.

He set his chin on her shoulder, his stubble pricking her skin. "Let it go, Carissa. Honor the price I'm paying on your behalf. Yes, you've made mistakes, but I've worked it out, haven't I?"

He'd done more than that; he'd made her mistakes into something beautiful. Her journey to Zonah had lead her to Elon. Her time spent as a nightwoman had lead to her acceptance of marriage to Elon. And even the tragedy and pain she'd experienced had brought her closer to him.

She released a slow breath, and the pain slowly ebbed. Elon had paid the price for her mistakes. She would honor his sacrifice by forgiving herself as he had. By the time she drew an inhale, she felt nothing but the chill of the water.

"There." Elon brushed her hair over her shoulder, the strands catching on his wet fingers.

She shivered and drew her legs closer to her chest. "I'm cold." She glanced at him pointedly, expecting he'd take the opportunity to pull her close.

Elon nodded. "It is quite chilly."

Men. They were so dense sometimes. "I wasn't asking for you to agree with me."

"I thought that's what I was supposed to do. Would you rather I disagree?" Laughter laced his tone.

"No. I was asking for you to fix it." She arched her eyebrows. "You're my husband, aren't you? Isn't it your job to keep me warm?"

The laughter escaped him, pouring out into the night. "You could have simply said so, and I would have been more than happy to oblige."

She huffed. "I thought my meaning was obvious enough."

He merely grinned and pulled her to her feet.

The air struck her wet legs, and she shivered harder. "Elon, what are you—"

He tugged her out of the stream before pulling her close, his left hand entwined with her right, his other hand cupping the curve of her waist. Pressed as close as she was, she could feel every swell of his chest and thud of his heart. There was something comforting about the steady rhythms that she'd missed.

"Carissa, would you care for a dance?"

***

Author's Note: I'M SORRY ABOUT THE LATE UPDATE! I should have scheduled my time better and tried to type it up on the plane ride. :P Anyhow I'm at a writers' conference SELLING CAPTIVE AND CROWNED. EEEEEEEEEEE!!! I'm not making millions or anything (I know I've sold at least four copies...), but it's something. Big things start small. ;) 

And shoutout to my amazing boyfriend! I was busy, so he proofread and posted the last chapter + sneak peek. 💖

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