fragile | jelix

chapter 40

12 years later

"last night, irish-american resident florrie mcloughlin was sentenced to life in prison after confessing to murdering her 15 year old son seán mcloughlin. 12 years ago, florrie drugged seán by giving him sleeping pills, and then gave him a morphine overdose as he slept; she tried to cover the whole thing up as a suicide. her son had been suffering from a rare bone condition his entire life, the same condition that had killed his sister when seán was just a young boy. florrie claims that the medical bills were so high and were costing the family more than they were making. she also states that she hated to see her son suffering, and thought it would be better for him if she 'put him out of his misery'. seán's father had nothing to do with the murder, so he has not been trialled. it just goes to show that the person who brought you into this life, can very easily take you back out.'

i watched the tv screen fade to black as marzia grabbed the tv remote and switched it off.

"it's honestly so disgusting. why would you even think about killing your own son in his sleep, despite any condition that he may or may not have? it makes me sick just hearing about it." i nodded and agreed with her. i had to pretend. i had to pretend that i didn't know about him, that he was just a stranger. just some dead boy on the news.

"i'll be right back down." i ran upstairs without waiting for a response off my girlfriend. i entered my recording studio and unlocked the secret drawer, the one marzia wasn't even allowed in. i opened it up, revealing only one item inside: a single piece of paper. i smiled weakly and retrieved the paper, unfolding it gently. it was old now. i didn't want to rip it after keeping it so pristine for all of these years.

the ink on the page made my eyes water and my heart ache. it was almost like he knew i would need this at some point in the future. like he knew this was going to happen. like he knew he was going to die.

i held the paper close to my chest and closed my eyes, allowing a single tear to roll down my cheek. images and memories of him and i flooded my brain all at once. i caressed the paper gently, as if it was him in my arms, and not just some note that he had written me over a decade ago. i looked down at the letter and smiled, trying not to get so upset. it was just too damn hard. in a pained whisper, i told him the one thing i couldn't that week, the one thing i wanted to tell him more than anything...

"i love you..."

end