Begin Again

Chapter 19

We headed back to his apartment to study. We both have a physics paper tomorrow. We were reading our respective notes on the couch. I tried my best to push whatever happened today with Derek Sherwood to the back of my mind. I can't afford to let him get to me.

After a few hours of studying while snacking on cherry tomatoes, we finally decided to sit back and relax. Matteo made Oreo milkshakes which were delicious.

"I didn't speak until I was seven," Matteo said all of a sudden.

I turned and raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean by that? Did you choose not to speak or was it selective mutism? You're generally a quiet person so I'm not surprised that you didn't speak much as a child."

"No, I mean I didn't say a single word until I was seven," he laughed. "My family was so concerned. They thought I was mute. They sent me to so many doctors, including my uncle, and no one could find a reason why I was unwilling to speak."

"They should've taken you to a psychologist," I remarked.

"They never thought of it," he replied, shrugging. "But, to their relief, I suddenly started talking when I was seven. They thought I was a slow developer. That's the reason they put me into homeschool. It definitely caught them by surprise when they saw how intelligent I actually was."

I nodded. "What about your brother? He's homeschooled too."

"Oh, his situation is the total opposite," he said. "My family thought he was way too smart to attend school so they homeschooled him. I've got to admit, though. He's very smart. But I'm definitely way smarter than him. He doesn't get perfect scores like I do!"

"Show off," I laughed. "Why would your parents still force you to socialise? You were a quiet kid. They should've inferred that you don't like interacting with others. If I had a child who didn't talk until he was seven, I won't... yeah."

"They thought to have me attending events with them will force me to interact with others and make me more talkative. Look where that led me," he replied, gesturing around him.

I burst into laughter. I rested my head on his lap and murmured, "Well, thanks to that, we met. And we are now the best of friends."

"Just the best of friends?" he asked.

My heart skipped a beat. What is he trying to imply? I gulped and replied, "I don't know. We can be anything we want to be." I looked up at his face. He looked down at me and smiled. I continued, "What do you want us to be?"

He rested his hand on my forehead. "I want you to be my girlfriend," he replied, stroking my hair. "I know you're not ready for a new relationship. We can take our time. We can start off as slightly more than friends."

"What if I'm never ready?" I asked.

"However long you take, I will wait for you," he said. "I'm not going anywhere." I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. Even Derek never said something so corny to me. "Hey, don't cry. Did I say something wrong?" he asked.

"No, you said everything right," I cried. Today was just too overwhelming for me. First, I saw Derek for the first time in three months and he wanted to get back together with me. Second, Matteo confessed to me. Third, he said something so touching.

He wiped my tears. He sighed, "If you're crying over Derek, I'll call my bodyguards to find him and personally escort him back to your little town. Why is he even here? Doesn't he have school?"

"It's Sunday," I pointed out.

"That makes sense," he murmured. "Shouldn't he be studying?"

"He's not like you, Matteo. He hates studying. That explains his SAT score," I replied, rolling my eyes and laughing. "He spends most of his time drinking with his friends. Now that I talk about it, how did I stay with him for three years."

He placed a finger near my lips. "Let's not talk about that asshole—"

"Le gasp! Matteo Knight uttered a profanity!" I gasped.

"Yeah, whatever," he muttered. "Thank you for appearing in my life, Alexia Grey. You changed me. You changed my way of living. You changed my perception of life. I may sound a little weird but... you're the best thing that has happened in my life."

"That's not weird. It's sweet," I replied. I held his hand and continued, "You made New York even better for me. You helped me a lot. You're a good friend. You're a good neighbour. You made it easier for me to adapt. You're awesome."

"I guess we help each other a lot. You helped me to open up a little and I helped you to adapt to life in Manhattan," he remarked.

I sat up and turned to lean back on the couch. His words from a minute or two again hit me all of a sudden. "Wait, you have bodyguards?"

He grinned sheepishly and replied, "Yeah... I kind of do. I have two. They don't follow me around that much. I'm not as well-known as my brother so I'm pretty safe. The bodyguards are just there because my parents are paranoid."

"Your parents love you so much, Matteo. Everything they've done is to help you. They sent you to self-defence lessons. They hired not one but two bodyguards for you. They made you attend social gatherings to help you talk more," I said.

"Well, my brother has four," he replied.

My eyebrows furrowed. Stubborn boy. "You already said he's more well-known. My point is you should visit them someday and thank them for taking such good care of you. Their efforts may seem like a nuisance to you but they have good intentions."

He nodded. "You're right. I only thought about my point of view. I thought they were trying to make things difficult for me but they're actually doing it for my own good."

Angling towards him, I smiled and brushed his face. I could feel my heart palpitating as I did that. This feels so intimate and I'm not sure how to act. He's so beautiful. I feel like kissing him. Did you just think of doing that? You have a paper tomorrow, Alexia!

"Alexia," he breathed, placing his hand on my waist.

"Matteo," I murmured. I'm not entirely sure of how I feel but, judging by how quick my heart is beating, I'm very nervous. I moved closer towards him and gently placed a kiss on his right cheek. It may be a little too soon to aim at the lips. It didn't feel right at this moment.

I removed my hand and lowered my head. I just kissed my best friend and neighbour who likes me and whom I possibly like back. Biting the inside of my cheek, I looked up.

"What did you do that for?" he asked. His face was as red as a cherry tomato. "I mean, I enjoyed it a lot. I'm just a little surprised but in a good way. I'm not complaining. But... what does this mean?"

Many words went through my mind as I searched for the right ones to use. I didn't want to ruin this moment by saying something wrong. Listen to your heart, Alexia. How do you feel? "I like you too," I replied. "I like you a lot."

A huge smile formed on his lips. He said, "I want to kiss you right now." I waited for him to continue but there was only silence. He's asking you for permission, silly. He's waiting for a witty response.

My lips parted. I didn't know what to say. I only knew what to do.

I kissed him.