Life and Death-1

Decisions

Get ready for a rollercoaster of emotions to come. This is going to get crazy.

Someone knocks on my door. I put my book down and head to my door. I open it and Alex stands outside of it. I go to close it but he stops me. "Please hear me out."

"I don't need to listen to listen to anything you have to say."

"I'm going through a lot right now."

"Alex..."

"Hey! I need you more than anything."

"No!" I scream needing him to hear me for once. "You don't get to treat me like shit and then beg for me to be there for you. I love you Alex. You're family but I don't have to put up with this abuse."

"I'm sorry Gen. I was...there was a lot going on with Rebecca and I just needed to figure it out..."

"We said we would be there for each other. You're an ass to everyone around you Alex but...how you treated me for her. That was unacceptable."

"You know I didn't mean any of that."

"Well, I'm just a stupid bitch who doesn't care."

"Gen..."

"I'm not someone you can use as a punching bag. I deserve more than that. I thought I was worth more to you than that."

"Gen please I..."

"I'm sorry Alex. I really am for everything that happened with Rebecca. I know how much you wanted to be able to be there for her but...that doesn't erase everything you've done to me. I need space from this friendship and I mean anything to you, then please give it to me." I close my door on him and I silent sob as I hear him walk back to his room. Why does this hurt so much? Why does losing part of yourself happen more than you want to."

__________________________________
"Are you ever going to tell me what happened with you and Karev?" Mark asks me as I try and relax in the nice big tub in his hotel room.

"I'm not talking about it, Mark." I fire back at him.

"Gen..." He comes over to lean against the wall looking at me. "You've been silent for days now. Seriously what happened?"

"It's not important."

"Anything is important if it makes you become withdrawn."

"I'm not withdrawn." I defend myself and Mark chuckles at me.

"You so are and if we're going to make this relationship work we need to be open with each other."

"Not about this we don't."

"Hell yes, we do. I'm your boyfriend and I demand to know what is making my girlfriend upset."

"You demand?" I ask raising my brow at him and he almost begins sweating.

"I mean...you know what yes. I do demand to know what is wrong. Or no more sex."

"You're not mature enough to take sex off the table."

"I'm the most mature in this relationship. Tell me!"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because...because you...you will overreact and I can't have that happening. Not right now."

"I won't overreact."

"Yes, you will."

"Gen, please I will be cal..."

"Alex yelled at me in front of everyone at the clinic and called me a stupid bitch."