Focus Henry

NOT AGAIN

I can't do this again, not now, just when I was okay for a little bit. It had to strike once again. I got another skin abscess, which is basically a thing that comes from a cut and it gets bacteria which causes it to get infected and hurt like a mother fucker. I cried for at least half an hour thinking why me, why me?. People who do know me know that I rarely cry, but it truly hurts, even though I hate to admit it. It restricts my arm movement. Last time I had it, it was on my right arm now it's on my left. I also had to get it cut open last time to remove all the infected stuff. That numbing shot didn't work worth a shit. But it makes sense since numbing things don't necessarily work on me. It's right on my nerves, which is the main reason why I can't move it. I mean, I can, but it hurts every single damm time I move it. My mother said if it's not healed or gone by tomorrow, I'm going to have to get another scar yet again. Which I don't mind, but it's a horrible memory to think of, how much pain it caused me. I feel useless, helpless I can't do anything with it. I am probably going to have to get another doctor's note to excuse me from gym, because wounds like that take time to heal at least a week or two. I feel terrible, more down than I have been. I don't know anymore. Trust me, I'm fine, but every time I'm happy, it's like it comes with a cost. Maybe I should just go back to how I used to be, see what happens. Maybe I'm being punished for no reason. Who knows.