Two Sides of The Same Coin: Grumpy x Sunshine

Exile

It tears right through your midsection, your blood splattering on Bucky's face.

He lets out a guttural, helpless scream when he feels your blood on his face. He looks up to see you standing there, blood staining your shirt. Even though it feels like he can't breathe, suddenly there's not a force on Earth strong enough to keep him away from you. He couldn't say how exactly he did it, how he tore through all those men surrounding the two of you, but in the blink of an eye he's standing in front of you, eyes wild and screaming at the top of his lungs, "Help! Someone help!"

"James," you choppily exhale, your eyes widened, still standing completely frozen in shock. Your knees give out from beneath as Bucky grabs you to drag you away from the thick of the action. The shock doesn't wean, your breaths coming quicker and quicker. He knows you're about to crash, "James."

He ignores you, his hands pressing down frantically trying to find the wound to stop the bleeding. "I need help!"

"It's okay," you choppily whisper.

"Goddammit, I need help here!"

"I'm just gonna.." you start shutting your eyes. "I'll be alright."

He harshly grabs your face, your skin quickly losing color. "Damn it, you keep your eyes open!"

"Okay," you wheeze, though your eyes are already shutting again.

"No, no, no, no...," he desperately pleads, shaking you roughly. "Someone help me!"

It's only seconds that pass, but to Bucky it feels like hours. Like it's been hours that he's holding your wound, screaming at the top of his lungs for help, listening to each shaky exhale.

And then time seems to pass too quickly.

Sam looking bewildered, throwing himself on his knees next to Bucky as he frantically tries to help you.

Even Steve looked broken at the sight of you lying there in the middle of the woods, bleeding out right in front of them.

Then, Steve and Sam both shouting orders at every single person around them.

Putting you on a stretcher.

Steve holding him back as they wheel you into surgery.

And he's so sure that was the last time he's ever going to see you again. He's positive that he's never going to hear your laugh again, feel you climb into his bed or feel your arms around him, he's never going to feel the warmth of your sun-drenched presence, or the peaceful happiness that you gave him.

He's never going to have any of it ever again.

"Damn it," Bucky shouts, his real hand flying into a hospital wall. There's a large crack in the cement wall from Bucky's fist. The nurses in the surrounding area all look bewildered at the commotion and damage, and all look equally ready to call security.

"Uh, we'll pay for that," Sam appeases, pulling Bucky away from the damaged wall and into the waiting room. Despite Sam feeling as broken as Bucky looks, he sits him down in a chair.

Sam's mind whirls with rampant thoughts. Just this morning, you were fine. And now you're- Sam can't even think about it. It makes him want to crumple on to the floor, and if he does, he's not sure that he'll ever get up again.

Bucky's not paying attention and barely even notices that Steve is still there with him and Sam. "Buck, why don't you go take a shower? You've got blood all over you," Steve gently suggests.

"No," he responds numbly.

"Come on," Steve tries again, tugging at his arm to pull him out of the chair. "I'll let you know if there's any updates."

"No," he exhales, his eyes staring at the vacant wall in front of him. "I need to be here."

"You're covered in her blood," Steve gently reminds him.

"Exactly," Bucky snaps, ripping his arm out of Steve's hold. "Her blood is on my hands. It's my fault she's lying there."

"That's not-"

"That bullet was meant for me," he seethes, his jaw clenched so tightly that it physically hurts. "You and I both know that. I could've- I should've...I was too busy yelling at her. Distracting her. I didn't-"

"Bucky, stop. She's going to be fine."

His head snaps up showing his pained, guilt-ridden expression. "I told you no."

He sits there, neither Sam nor Steve try and say anything else. They leave him be. And he sits there, his hands, face, clothes caked in your blood. He doesn't have it in him to cry, to say anything, he just feels empty. He knows people are staring at him, security keeping one eye at him at all times, he can't bring himself to care. He just lost the person he loved most.

He just keeps staring. He's not sure how long has passed when in his peripheral, he sees the doctor approach, he's vaguely aware of the words she's saying, "She sustained massive internal injuries. We've stopped the bleeding- so she's stable but still in critical condition, we'll keep monitoring her."

"So she's out of the woods?" Sam asks hopefully.

"No," the doctor apologetically says. "But she's made it this far, which is a good sign. We do seem to be missing medical records, if any of you have any knowledge of her history or the number of her doctor-."

"I do," Sam quickly replies. "I can get that. Can I see her first?"

"She's in recovery right now, then she'll be moved to the ICU, so I can't let any of you back there at the moment. We'll be closely monitoring her for signs of infection, any more internal bleeding. That sort of thing."

"She, uh, she's got a weak immune system- just so you know. If that makes any difference," Sam offers, his voice sounding as broken as both he and Bucky feel.

The doctors nods. "I'll make sure I let the nurses know. Anything else?"

"No, I'll go get those records. Thank you."

Bucky can distantly hear an exchange between Sam and Steve- where your records are, that one of them has to report back and let the team know what happened.

Then Steve leaves after offering to take care of it, leaving Sam and Bucky alone in the waiting room. They both sit there, neither of them know what to say, the weight heavy in their hearts as they wait.

And wait.

And wait.