Swift as a Coursing River | Ongoing

12. A walk through time (part 1)

Sorry if the formatting between paragraphs is weird. Wattpad messed that up.

***

Edwin is surprised how easy it is to text Vincent. It's polite, to the point, not awkward, no flirting. They exchanged numbers to arrange where Vincent is going to take him and when, but he expected it to be another situation where Vincent's presence invades his breathing space. Instead, their messages are almost distant. For the first time, it feels like he can see beyond Vincent's presence. It's intimate, but Edwin is aware that's only his perception: now he has an armour against Vincent's piercing and analysing gaze and Vincent is stripped bare of his outward playfulness.

"If you've not changed your mind yet," so starts Vincent's first text, "I've found the perfect introduction to queer history for you."

Edwin's resolve strengthens at the doubt Vincent expresses. "I have not changed my mind."The perfect introduction turns out to be a walk through Antwerp. Edwin has to admit it's a good idea. They won't be alone together. He might meet other queer people. As long as they're walking, he won't have to look at Vincent. And gay history seems like the best way to understand gay culture.

They agree on next Sunday, because he might as well bite the bullet. The days after the details have been arranged are not unnerving in their lack of texts from Vincent, no, even if he can conjure what Vincent is thinking about him or different scenarios that could play out on Sunday. Vincent won't embarrass him, he will show up, he won't mock him, he won't flirt with Edwin - no, he will, but Edwin can deal with that and will know it's not serious - he won't flirt with anyone else and leave Edwin alone. It's a walk, they will talk, they will be polite. Vincent will teach him and Edwin will listen and learn and try not to judge.

On the day of, he eats an early lunch that coils in his stomach. He dresses warm and comfortable, since it's a chilly October day, and he absolutely does not stand in front of his closet for twenty minutes. Then it's a waiting game because they're only gathering at 3:45 pm and he doesn't want to be too early. He tries to read, but it doesn't stick, so he dusts and vacuums the living room instead. And folds the laundry. And vacuums the bedroom for good measure.

He arrives at the bar at 3:30 pm. It sits on the corner of a street and is called Que Pasa and Vincent mentioned it's an LGBT bar. Edwin walks to and fro along the tram tracks embedded in the street, his hands in his pockets. He consciously relaxes his shoulders and studies the buildings, the passers-by, the names of the streets splitting off, the pattern of the cobblestones. When he stops again in front of Que Pasa, he looks down the street and sees a familiar face. He smiles before he realises it and takes a hand out of his pocket. Vincent sees him too and waves.

"Edwin, darling. Glad you are here. Let's go inside. I'm sure we're not the only early birds." Edwin nods and follows Vincent. He makes a beeline for a group of people standing off to the side. They broaden the circle for Edwin and Vincent and smile.

A guy with some kind of Asian roots exclaims: "Vincent! I didn't expect you. You're here for the walk?"

Vincent laughs. "Surprise, darling!" He puts a casual hand on Edwin's shoulder. "Edwin here wanted an introduction to queer history."

The Asian guy holds out his hand. "Nice to have you. I'm Philippe and I'm the guide."

Edwin turns to Vincent. "Do you know everyone? I thought ..." He trails off. He knew Vincent didn't organise this walk and that someone else would talk about the gay history of the places they will pass, but Vincent knows the guide and whoever else, so Vincent won't be paying attention to him. That should be a good thing, but he had hoped to have at least one person in his corner. If Vincent talks with all these other people he knows, Edwin will be the odd one out again, the one who doesn't belong with these people, who knows nothing. He'll be judged or make a fool of himself. Vincent forgave him and was willing to teach him when it was just the two of them, but would he still remember that when he's among like-minded friends?