They don't know (I've waited all my life)

chapter 1

Maya Bishop had always understood two things very well. Ever since she was a child Lane had taught her to set her eye on the prize and let nothing or no one else cloud her judgment. Maya Bishop had understood that she had to keep her eyes forward if she wanted to reach her goals. Yet somewhere along the way she had started to care for a certain group of firefighters.

She knew she had to keep her eyes forward but she also knew that the people at station 19 would forever be her family. Or so she had thought. She never knew people she trusted so deeply to have her back could turn on her so badly.

And so Maya was tired, tired of trusting people, tired of her job, tired of her best friend's stare, tired of the teams' comments calling her a backstabber. She had dealt with all of this for the better part of a year and she couldn't bear to do it for a second more.

So she did the second thing she had understood at a very young age, she ran. Ran to a different city, to a new job, and a new mindset towards life. She was never going to trust anyone the way she had 19. She was going to walk into a new life, to a new station and carry on keeping her eyes forward, no distractions. No one to call family.

And it would've stayed that way had it not been for one beautiful soul she met along the way, Carina DeLuca, the woman whose eyes light up every time she spoke, who spoke Italian at a rapid pace every time she was frustrated, the woman who made space for herself in Maya's heart without her ever realizing it, and she found herself opening up to yet another person. She found herself in love.

But Carina was nothing but a breath of fresh air, Maya felt as if she had been waiting her whole life for Carina, she finally felt complete in Carina's arms. Carina felt like coming home. She had never felt anything like it her whole life.

Home had always been an unsettling place for Maya, first with Lane and his expectations, then with 19 and their judgment, but coming home to Carina she only felt love and acceptance, she felt understood, like there was someone who saw all of her and chose to love her anyways, flaws and all. And she never wanted to stop feeling like that.

So Maya Bishop understood one last thing, she understood that she would always love Carina, that she would always choose Carina and that with Carina she would forget those two things her dad had taught her. She knew that her eyes would never be forward again, rather they would search for Carina every time she walked into a room and not settle until they found their home, and Maya knew that Carina was one thing she would never run from rather she would always be something Maya ran towards, Carina would be her goal and her reward. She would be Maya's family if no one else would. From here on out she only believed in Carina DeLuca.

Or rather Carina DeLuca-Bishop after they had gotten married almost two years ago, a small wedding with some of Carina's friends and her brother. It had all felt too bittersweet for Maya knowing that she was marrying the love of her life miles away from people she had once considered family. Seeing Carina with her best friends, Maya was reminded of her own, she wondered how they all were, she wondered if they ever thought of her too.

That night Carina had held Maya and whispered sweet nothings into her ears, comforting and shielding her wife from her own thoughts. She kissed Maya slowly on the forehead and whispered "I'm here" over and over again while also promising herself that she would always be there for Maya no matter what that looked like.

And Carina had kept that promise supporting Maya through her Battalion Chief application, her promotion, and Maya's choice to move back to Seattle. Carina was wary of the choice knowing how certain people had treated her wife but it was mostly overshadowed by Maya's giddiness knowing she was going to be chief and even Carina's own knowing she'd finally be close to her brother who was Grey-Sloan's newest general surgery attending.

And so Maya and Carina had moved to Seattle, bought a house that was somewhat close to the hospital but also the stations Maya was going to oversee, and they had taken Andrew's help to unpack and settle down, but now with everything out of the way all that remained was nerves. Carina was nervous to start a new job but she knew Maya's head was racing knowing she'd have to see people she swore to never see again.

The day Maya was scheduled to be introduced to all the stations she didn't get up early and go on a run, or endlessly pace the house, instead she turned around in the comfort of her bed and in the arms of her wife staring into the freckle above her lips only knowing peace and serenity.

Carina's eyes slowly flickered open and she started to shift a little but remained facing Maya. "You know it's rude to stare" she whispered, getting closer to Maya and resting her head on her wife's chest.

"Am I not allowed to admire my wife?" asked Maya, kissing her wife's forehead.

"Hmm" she said as if she was thinking the idea through "You are allowed bambina si , but maybe after you make me breakfast and a cup of caffè ".

Maya gasped in surprise at her wife who still hadn't opened her eyes but smiled anyways doing as she was told and standing up only to be pulled back to bed.

"I didn't mean this second" Carina said with her eyes fully open now, pinning Maya underneath her and finally giving her the pleasure of a morning kiss from her wife.

It didn't take all but two seconds for Carina to move the kiss to Maya's neck as she let out a small moan of pleasure while Carina moved up to Maya's ear.

"Mmm good morning bella " she husked out her voice now deeper and more strained moving her hands towards her wife's breasts cupping them softly.

Maya couldn't even think fast enough to say those same words back before she heard an alarm go off in the distance and just like that her body was cold again. She looked up confused as she saw her wife now leaning on the bathroom door.

" Avanti! we're going to be late on our first day" she said as she turned around and walked towards the shower and Maya just sat there still recovering from the last 5 minutes but now with a small smile on her face as she stood up and went on with her previous mission of making her wife breakfast and coffee.