The Will

CHAPTER 4: MESSED UP

I sat in my room, distressed as ever. I felt so useless, helpless and depressed. I was going to get married to someone i didn't even know. I knew that luxury was nowhere in my fate. So it was indeed too good to be true. Tomorrow my parents had called the groom and his family so they can get my Nikkah done as soon as possible. I tried to hope for the best but in some corner of my mind I felt a negative energy. I cried myself to sleep and awaited for the sun to rise and my world to collapse as well because I had no control over the situation. Anything I would try to do at this point would cause further complications so I decided that it would be best  for me to just let things move in their own way.

The next morning

I woke up with swollen eyes, emphasizing my grief from last night. My mom barged into my room and said

"Wake up beta, here's the lehenga for your Nikkah put it on and I'll be back to help you get dressed and put on your jewelry."

I simply nodded in response and went over to the bathroom to take a shower, I felt the warm drops of water trickling down my body providing me with peace, conceivably for the last time in my entire life. Once I was fresh, I put on my lehenga and put on some light coral makeup. My face clearly indicated my emotions. My mom came in and helped me put on jewelry and at last my face was covered with a veil. I was stepping into an unknown world with a complete stranger. I didn't even know his name. I felt restless but I tried to hold myself together.

It was time for the Nikkah to take place so my mom and aunts came to my room and took me to the lounge where the Nikkah would take place. I sat opposite my soon to be husband with a veil separating us from seeing each other. The molvi sahab asked my soon to be husband for his consent in marriage and that's when I heard his name was Zaahir Imraan. The name was captivating but what if the actual person wasn't the way I magined. Zaahir replied by saying "Qubool hai" (I accept) 3 times, answering the molvi sahab as he asked him the questions. Then it was my turn so the molvi sahab proceeded to ask for my consent and I said "Qubool hai" once, "Qubool hai" twice and the third time I hesitated as It hit me that this was something that would change my life forever but knowing that I couldn't do anything even if I detested the injustice or tried to oppose it I eventually had to say "Qubool hai" for the third time...

It was done, I was someone's wife now. My life would never be the same again. Zaahir approached me and lifted my veil gently making me feel some sort of way. He saw my face and I saw his. He had hazel brown eyes and black hair neatly combed back, he was generally quite handsome and honestly I couldn't take my eyes off him. He looked at me with an expressionless face, he forced a smile but I could tell it was fake.

We bid our farewells and Zaahir and I were taken to a hotel for the night and the next day we would depart to New Zealand which is where he lived. There was a deafening silence in the taxi, he didn't speak at all so I tried to break the ice by asking:

"Were you born in New Zealand or did you and your family move there?"

"My parents moved there for business when I was 8."

I hummed in response and asked the question that was eating me from inside.

"Are you happy with this marriage?"

He looked out of the window seeming as though he was thinking of what to reply with.  I think I may have rushed the question and maybe he was offended so I tried to ease the tension by saying

"I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have asked you such a question just pretend I didn't say anything" I looked away with my cheeks burning up in embarrassment.

"Look I only married you because my parents forced me I love someone else but my parents didn't approve of her so here I am married to you now and so, no I'm not happy."

I was stunned unable to comprehend the news he broke to me. Not only was I getting married to a complete stranger but a stranger who would probably never have space for me in his heart. It pained me to think of the worst which was me living a depressed life until I die. I wonder what I did to deserve this. I fell asleep in the taxi since the hotel was quite far and I was woken up by Zaahir once we arrived.

My lehenga was quite heavy so it was hard for me to get out. Zaahir noticed and gave me his hand for me to grab and come out. I appreciated the gesture but I still didn't feel too good about what he told me.

We took the elevator to our room and as we entered we saw decorations of rose petals and lamps on the bed and around the room, clearly welcoming the newly wedded couple. My heart was heavy and I felt sick to the stomach.

"You can sleep on the bed and I'll sleep on the couch." Zaahir said coldly.

"No it's ok I'll sleep on the couch." I protested.

"Don't argue, I bet your life has already been ruined by marrying me so honestly this is the least I can do." He looked at me with his cold gaze which noticeably softened.

I simply nodded and took off my jewelry and changed into some comfortable nightwear. We went to sleep in our respective places with our minds racing with various things as we looked at the ceiling.

                             ~~~~~~~

Authors note: Hello readers, I hope you're enjoying the book so far. Be sure to vote, comment your thoughts and recommend to your friends. Follow me on instagram @author_myrevonly for spoilers. Thank you 😊