The Will

CHAPTER 7: MY OWN WORLD

I was in my apartment scrolling through some of my designs and I think I was definitely on to something until I suddenly felt so gloomy. It felt as if I was missing a part of me. I couldn't comprehend the reason for my misery. It's not like we shared a bond anyway, but I had grown accustomed with his presence and it's supposed to hurt but his emotional abuse didn't cause me as much damage as I thought it would. Perhaps it could be because I've been going through this my entire life so I'm numb to it all. I was sad to leave my mother and father-in-law, they were better parents then mine could ever be. They probably think I'm some heartless person and that I didn't care about them when in reality they meant so much to me. Zaahir had a younger sister, Haaniya who was the sweetest younger sister that I never had.  I contemplated whether I should stay back and endure it but I can only continue doing that for so long and so I decided to leave everyone and everything behind, just so I can make my own wishes come true and live in the world that I always dreamt of. For once I wanted to be selfish. Didn't I have the right to that at least? To be my own person and to do what makes me happy.

I snapped out of my beautiful yet painful thoughts and went back to looking at my designs and started preparing a portfolio that would potentially and hopefully impress someone from at least one of the boutiques that I had decided to try to get interviewed by. I had a lot of pressure on my shoulders because I knew I only had one month to start earning something so I can live a happy and healthy lifestyle because I can't constantly rely on Dadaji, instead I need to step up and achieve something on my own, just like he always told me. I was reminded of him and decided to give him a call and tell him about my plan from now onwards. I'm wasn't going to let any of my family members know about anything as they would simply make my situation worse but my Dadaji was defineitly an exception because he is the only one who deserves and cares enough to know. I then proceeded to call him. "Assalamualaikum Dadaji, how are you. I miss you so much." "Walaykumsalam mera baccha I'm doing well and I miss you too what are you up to. I missed him calling me with that cute expression 'mera baccha' it always brought me tears to my ears when I thought of him when he wasn't around. I explained the whole situation about Zaahir and I and the way our relationship took a toss and how I'm currently planning to start spreading my wings now. "Beta I won't stop you, neither will I say you were wrong, but don't you think you rushed by taking a divorce? It has only been 4 months since you got married." I was silent and didn't have anything to say mostly because I also didn't know what to reply with, but I switched the topic by telling him that I had submitted my portfolio to 2-3 boutiques. He was overjoyed and was genuinely proud of me. "See Dadaji, I'm going to reach somewhere big thanks to your encouragement. I just know it."

We then talked about a few other random topics before I hung up and went to bed eagerly waiting for a response from either of the boutiques that I had sent my portfolio to, but I figured that I won't be able to sleep tonight because the anxiety was killing my insides resulting in me tossing and turning all night until I eventually fell asleep at 2AM. It's either one of 2 responses, yes or no but I didn't understand why I was panicking so much. Would my world turn upside down in the best or worst way possible, I guess I would find out the answer to that burning question in the morning.

Authors note: Hey everyone, I know it's been a while and I'm sorry if you've been waiting but don't worry I will be updating more frequently from now on. As usual please don't forget to vote, comment and recommend my story to your friends and also follow me on Instagram @myrevonly._.writess for spoilers and updates. Thank you to everyone who has reached this far into my story I realllyyyyyyy appreciate you soooooo much😘