Foolish one

Chapter 39

The next weeks of preseason passed quickly and so did the national team camp. Jorge was still treating me differently. He praised me for everything I did and talked down to my other teammates. I hated everything about him and the national team. The last day I was called into Jorge's office, alone.

"Do you know why I called you in here?" he asked with a smile on his face. All the warning signals were going off, something was not right here. "I have no idea" I answered. My hands were shaking, and I felt my heart beating faster and faster. "I helped start your career. Don't you think I deserve something in return?" he said. It wasn't a question, and I knew what he wanted. I did not want to do that. "I don't" I answered shortly and stood up from the chair I was sitting in.

Suddenly, I felt his hand gripping my arm tightly. It would leave a mark, for sure. "Sit back down" he said with authority. "Now what would be a proper gift for me?" he asked. We both knew what he wanted, and I wanted nothing about that. "I am not doing or giving you anything for calling me up here" I told him. "Then you might not attend the next camp" he threatened. "Are you threatening me?" I asked. "I'm just telling you what will happen" he answered before opening the door.

I walked out of his office with tears streaming down my face. He had done exactly what I feared he would do. Alexia was sitting right outside, waiting for me. She had followed with, just as I had asked her to do. I fell into her arms. She held me tightly and helped me calm down.

Alexia walked with me to her room and made sure I told her everything that had happened. Mapí was also there, along with several of our teammates. We talked about everything he had done, and I was not the only one who was treated differently. Everyone agreed that he was a bad man. Some of the girls who listened apologized for their earlier actions. They apologized for their jealousy and their hatred. Alexia was angrier than me, and so was Mapí. I would have felt the same and I could not hate them for their feelings.

They all left soon enough. Now it was only Mapí, Alexia, and I left in their room. "What are we going to do? We should complain to someone, and what is that on your wrist?" Alexia asked worriedly. "He grabbed my wrist, it must be from that. We are also not doing anything about him" I answered calmly. I was way calmer than they were. Alexia was hugging me tightly, and so did Mapí. "We must do something, he can't just continue to do this against you. I won't let him" Alexia continued. I knew how she wanted to protect me.

"You will do nothing; I will say exactly what you can do in this situation. You will do nothing if I say that you should do nothing" I told her. The tone I said it in showed my authority. "We can't let him treat you like this. Isn't it like sexual assault what he did? He also threatened you Isa. You can't be the only one he has done something like this against" Mapí explained.

"This is a 'she said he said' situation. They won't believe me, a nineteen-year-old girl. What is my word against his? They will all say that I made it all up, just because he won't play me. I will be labelled a liar, someone who does things to get playtime. They won't believe me and I will be someone to look down at" I sobbed into Mapí's shoulder. "This is all so wrong" Mapí said. "But it is how it is" I responded. You should believe the victims, instead of saying that they lie.

When you don't believe the victims, you let horrible people walk free. Men who should get punished walk free instead. Every single woman I know has experienced something like this. They have experienced sexual comments, sexual assault, rape, or have been threatened by men. It should not be like this, but it is too hard to prove that something has happened. But who would lie about something like this? Who would lie about the worst experience in their life?

I would never lie about something like this. I would never want to relive that night. It is better to push it down in some deep hole and never think about it anymore. I've talked about all my experiences with someone. I have talk to friends, to family, and to a therapist. Going to court would not be something I would survive.