total drama dumbasses

back at camp pt1 | chapter forty five

HEATHER

As I sat in the corner of the fucking boat, I regretted all the choices I had made before.

I mean, I'm already rich with a rich Spanish boyfriend, why did I have to be so greedy and try my chances with twenty or so contestants to win another million dollars? If I didn't do that then maybe I wouldn't be caught up in three seasons of bullshit.

"Cheer up a bit, Heather," Bridgette said encouragingly. Cheer up? How could I possibly cheer up when I could be doing much better things than going back to Camp Wawanakwa? "It's only until we find Cody."

"Oh yeah?" Duncan sneered. "How long is that going to be, Bridgette? It could take days, weeks, months, years-"

"Can you stop talking to Bridgette like that?" Geoff said angrily, and resumed his usual happy demeanour. "But seriously, we can make this a good experience! It doesn't have to be trauma."

"You mean I should pretend that this place doesn't bring back horrible memories of playing with the barriers of life or death?" Gwen said and rolled her eyes. "Great idea, Geoff."

These people are all so pathetic. I care about Cody a lot, he's like a brother to me despite our differences, but they're making this harder than it needs to be. These bitches aren't normally like this. It may be the influences of the cameras on every inch of the boat already, and Chris happily standing at the dock. We were so far away from the dock, but could already see his speckled body in the distance. 

"I promised I would never come here again," Duncan said dramatically. "I swore I would never set foot on this island aga-"

"Stop being a big whiny pick me and making this harder than it needs to be, Duncan," Noah said. Ever since Noah went feral on Duncan in the group chat they've been giving each other the silent treatment, so it was surprising to see Noah actually say something to that grass block of a man. 

"Like you can talk, c-"

Courtney interrupted before he could say something racist enough to get him back in juvenile prison.

 I mean, I'm not complaining. 

"It's not that serious. Just find Cody, get rid of Sierra. Easy!" She clapped her hands together, which earned her a sigh from Noah, a weird face from Gwen and confused bubble eyes from Lindsay, who stared for about two seconds and went back to making friendship bracelets. I think she and Courtney have some unspoken beef because Lindsay got Eras tickets.

"Easy," Trent muttered. "I thought the cooking challenge with Lindsay was easy and I got paralysed by pufferfish venom."

"Hey, at least you're still alive," Justin said absentmindedly. Justin is so cunty, but only talks when Trent talks. I wish Alejandro wasn't driving the fucking yacht and could be next to me so I can bully him into buying me things. 

"I just wanna go home," Harold whined, hugging his legs close to his chest. "I don't wanna be back here again."

The cameras turned to face him on cue, filming his meltdown. 

"Can you fuck off, Chris?" I yelled. "Leave Harold and his meltdown alone, for fuck's sake." 

This is all so dumb. Chris just wants internet clout, and he's using us to get more money and fame. Blainely is such a bitch but she would've been a better host. At least she wouldn't dump us back at Camp.

When we reached the dock, Chris flashed his shimmering smile and said, "Welcome, Campers!" before Gwen stepped off, shoved him backwards and said, "Save your bullshit. We're here to find Cody."

And that's going on national television.

This is so fucked.

a/n

js realised i havent updated this in ages tf (2 days or sumn)

ive been reaaaally busy with maths