Fitoor | ✓

05 | Paanch

05 | Paanch

"What?" Lekh probably couldn't digest what he was hearing.

"I'll marry you." I have to, for my child.

When Lekh had barged in to tell her they should get married, Tara was astounded. She hated being in this house, without Kartavya she felt vulnerable. It felt like everyone wanted to harm her. And their baby. She felt like home wasn't home and she could feel all the coldness of the place in her heart. Every nerve of her body told her to run away. Just like Lekh had suggested.

But where would she go. She had never been to college, she had no parents, her brother won't keep a widow in his house and no one would give her a job. And it wasn't just about her anymore, it was also about the child she was carrying. She had a life growing inside her, a life she would protect at all costs. Tara wanted to keep this life in her womb forever, it was the safest place she could provide for her child.

Lekh's brows furrowed, but then he nodded. She wondered what Indira had done to make Lekh so helpless. This could never be his decision. She felt like a burden already.

"What happened to me?" Tara asked, she was scared. Indira had taxed her up with all the chores and she could feel her body getting tired.

"You don't have to worry, nothing serious. Your blood pressure dropped, you are fine now. You just need to have bed rest." Lekh's voice wasn't comforting but it seemed nervous. As if he was trying to be soft but he just couldn't be. Anymore.

Tara had often heard from Kartavya and their sisters about how sweet and soft Lekh used to be. It seemed impossible to believe that a now cold Lekh had once been charming. For the first time since she had met him, Tara noticed his sharp features. He was lean and tall and handsome. His hair was jet black, just like his eyes. His eyes were perhaps what intimidated everyone. When he looked at people, it felt like he was looking in the depths of their soul, like he was aware of all that they had done; everything they hid from the world.

No one ever looked back into his eyes, maybe if they did, they'd realise he had secrets too.

Tara tried to lift herself up to sit up on the bed, Lekh immediately came to her side. He touched her shoulders to help her up, but Tara flinched. He retreated immediately, his jaws and fists clenched as a reflex. Tara cringed, she didn't do it on purpose. But his touch, it felt so foreign.

No man had ever touched her but Kartavya. And once again her mind was poured with thoughts about how this marriage was going to work. Was her life after this marriage going to be liveable? There were too many questions and just no answers at all.

"I am sorry." She muttered finally. The silence in the room was overbearing, so much so that she thought she'd go deaf if she didn't hear any voice.

Lekh nodded, "The point of this marriage is to keep the baby safe. That's it." He said firmly.

Tara kept her eyes down. How was she going to adjust, Kartavya had loved her so much. He had been so kind and soft and nice. How was she going to get used to Lekh's coldness? Or maybe she didn't have to, all she needed was a safe home for her child which he was ready to provide. She couldn't ask him for anything else. He didn't want this as much as she did.

A nurse finally walked in the room, "Mr. Lekh, your wife's discharge papers are ready. You can go to the reception to complete the formalities. I'll get Mrs. Rajput ready to go."

Both of them cringed at the nurse's words but neither said a word. Lekh silently walked out of the room and the nurse walked besides Tara to get her ready out of the bed.

"Your husband is so handsome." The nurse said, she was perhaps in her mind forties. One of those women who ate gossip more than food.

Tara didn't say anything as the nurse helped her change into her normal clothes.

"I can predict your child is going to be very beautiful." She smiled at her. Tara smiled, because she agreed. Her child was going to be very beautiful. When Tara wasn't stressed with everything that was going on she often wondered how her baby was going to look like. Was it going to look like her or like Kartavya.

And what was she going to name him or her. Kartavya and her always used to fight about names when they thought about the babies they were going to have. She always hated the names Kartavya suggested, he always thought of extravagant and fancy names while Tara always thought of the sweet and simple ones. They carry more love, she always told him. They carry more meaning, he always told her when she rejected his names.

Tara smiled at her memories.

The nurse kept blabbering but nothing made sense to Tara. She had shut her out and her mind rejoiced the good old days. She could drown in those memories and never come back.

The nurse nudged Tara waking her up from her thoughts.

"Huh?"

"I said, you are good to go." The nurse repeated amusingly.

Tara nodded, "Can you show me the way to the reception?"

"Yes, sure."

However, the nurse only had to lead her to outside the door. Lekh sat waiting outside the room and when he saw Tara come out he stood up.

"Ready?" he asked, stoic as ever.

"Ready."