Fire and Ice Book 2 (Loki X Reader)

Those who remained at home

It has been twenty-six days since (y/n) disappeared. More precisely twenty-six days and eleven hours and ten minutes. Loki counted every painful second spent without her. No matter how hard the Avengers tried to find her, there was no result. They contacted every intergalactic force they knew to get some intel. The only clue they had was that maybe it was the Chitauri who kidnapped her. Unfortunately, it didn't help the investigation since their current location remained unknown. Even Heimdall couldn't see them or (y/n).

As the days passed by, there were no new clues as they were still waiting for some of the contacts to report, and investigation slowly got stuck and stopped. They didn't care anymore. Or at least Loki felt this way. He was furious that his friends are just sitting at home like they already have moved on. Like everything was normal, while somewhere out there (y/n) is in danger. He knew they did everything they could, still, he couldn't stand the feeling that maybe they were giving up on her. They just couldn't stop when she needed them the most. They all were her family, and it seemed like nobody cared anymore. The only two people who still tried as hard as him was Steve and Thor. Steve because (y/n) was his best friend, and the blond god because he saw her as family now.

First of all, Loki blamed himself. He hated that he was in Asgard when all this happened. He had something important back in Asgard that he wanted to bring back to Earth. Because of that he wasn't by your side and couldn't protect you. It was all his fault, he felt guilty for not being with you. If he had been with you, maybe... The many thoughts starting with 'What if' tortured him. He didn't even know, how this exactly happened, because the others didn't tell him, just turned their heads in sorrow. He felt like he's completely alone, though his brother and Steve stood by him. His other half, his love was kidnapped by an evil force, and he wasn't there. He knew the Chitauri and what they were capable of. They once tortured him, and now they were doing the same to you. This thought was driving him crazy.

During the days he was trying to find some answers in the library. He desperately wanted to find a spell or any methods which could locate the Eternal Flame, and you. He searched almost every book that was related to the Eternal Flame, but so far he didn't succeed. If he wasn't in the library, he was just roaming around the tower, like he was waiting for accidentally bumping into you around a corner. It never happened. His eyes were empty like his mind was in a different time and space. His cheeks were hollow, his face as pale as ever, his hair tangled and ungroomed. He wasn't eating and started to look like a living dead wandering around the corridors. The others were worried about him, but he refused any kind of help. He wanted to be alone. He wanted the unbearable pain to go. He often found his way to the bottom of the bottle, while sitting with Stark at the bar. They never talked. The two men were just sitting side by side and were drinking without a word. Loki liked it this way. He didn't need the small talk about getting himself together or moving on. He just wanted to numb the pain in his heart.

At nights he couldn't sleep. He had nightmares that were always the same: he was running in the dark and heard you shouting his name, praying for him to save you. He couldn't see anything just tried to follow your voice, and run as fast as he could. Then he heard you scream out his name in pain one last time, and everything went silent. He always woke up in cold sweat. After nights like that he couldn't return to sleep. He couldn't stay in the bed you once shared. It was full of painful memories like you peacefully sleeping in his arms, while he was stroking your hair and arms. He wanted to hug you again, to feel the heat of your body and the touch of your skin, to kiss the top of your head, to breathe your sweet scent in. But he was alone in the cold sheets and your scent was slowly fading away.

He often walked up to your room and spent the rest of the night there. Your sweet scent filled the room, and your things were still where you left them like you'd return at any minute. Your freshly started books lied on the table, your clothes were lazily dropped on a chair. The sight of your room broke his heart, still, this was the only place he could still feel your presence. On sleepless nights he always curled up on your bed and waited for the first rays of sunshine to come.

Even though he was in a terrible condition and his compunction was eating him alive, he knew he had to stand his ground for you. He woke up every morning to continue researching just because he knew you needed him. That you were still counting on him and waiting for him. He knew he couldn't give up because neither did you. You were the only thing that filled his mind and his only motivation was to find you. Once, back in Jotunheim he almost had lost you. He couldn't lose you again. You were the sunshine that lighted up his life and led him out of the darkness of his mind. He loved you more than anything. He wanted to be by your side again, to hold and never let you go. You were his better half, and he wasn't whole without you. The burn mark on his arm reminded him every day.

Thor was worried about his brother. He sank deeper and deeper into depression each day, and seemed like nothing could help him. The Thunder God had the idea of bringing his brother on missions with him, so maybe he would snap out of his dark mood even if for a few hours. Miraculously Loki agreed to go, but soon it turned out to be a bad idea. When Loki heard the screams and shouts of people in trouble all around, it was like you shouting his name. All he could hear was your pained voice ringing in his ears. He couldn't concentrate on the fight or saving those people. All he wanted was to mute the voices in his head. Soon, he stopped going out on missions with Thor and became more and more unsociable.

***
Thank you for reading! I hope you liked the story so far! I'm having the conception of writing one chapter in Loki's p.o.v. and the next in (y/n)'s and so on. Please, let me know in the comments, what do you guys think about it!
Thank you if you vote, and have a nice day! <3