Retribution, A Spencer Reid/Criminal Minds Fanfic

Chapter 28. Jealousy and Innocence

After Hotch and Rossi left, Reid thought the ban on using telepathy could be considered temporarily lifted.

I see what you’re saying about how all this might have happened to our child’s psyche, but what do we do to fix it?

Without any risk to either our baby or Hotch, Ana interjected.

The doctor shook his head. There is always risk. And I feel it bears repeating: this is new territory for me as well. So, although no better help than mine can be found, the methods I wish to use have not been proven effective for your specific circumstances. Still…a decidedly cheerier note infused his thoughts…I DO think we can get through this without anyone coming to harm. As I said before, I see the greatest risk occurring and, therefore, the greatest vigilance being needed, in the months, or even years, after we separate the essence from Aaron.

Reid’s brows drew together. And that risk would be if Hotch and our baby…Melinda… He smiled as he officially used the name they’d been considering for the first time….somehow meld together again, right?

Yes. The child won’t know any better. She’ll only know she wants something; that something’s missing from her world. She’ll find him and try to resume her contact. What concerns me most is that we have no idea just how powerful this offspring of yours will be. And there is another thing to consider: as the psyche of your child rests in Aaron, it also becomes comfortable, and therefore attracted to, his own natural presence; what he is on his own, separate and alone from the residual energies that initially lured her in. Even when she is removed and has her own parents to fill the void, she may be drawn to seek out that very particular combination that resides in Aaron and is unique to him.

In addition, I suspect that even without having developed her cognitive processes, the child might learn resistance from the initial separation. If she finds a way to return, we may not be able to remove her again…at least, not by the same means. The doctor raised his chin, appearing to listen to something. Your friends are returning. We’ll go over how I think we should proceed once they arrive.

During the few minutes it took Hotch and Rossi to walk back to the house, the doctor had the opportunity to make sure there was no lingering misunderstanding between the young father-to-be and his wife.

Telepath, you do understand the empath’s desire to touch Aaron’s mind is no threat to you, don’t you?

Reid nodded, but there was still a sulky look to him. He realized both Ana and their host weren’t going to be fooled. I know there’s nothing to be jealous of, but…he raised his head and confronted the old man defiantly…I still feel…greedy…when it comes to her. I know I don’t need to, but I do.

The doctor’s answering smile reassured the young agent that he wasn’t a complete fool to feel the way he did. Not a total, complete, imbecilic fool… but maybe only a trifle foolish; a much more charitable way to judge his reaction.

Telepath, I keep forgetting how young the rest of humanity is. Of course you feel protective and wary when other males enter the picture. She is the greatest gift you have every received. But you know innately that she is not your property. There is an inherent conflict in the two realizations.

Reid couldn’t deny the truth of the old healer’s words. He glanced toward Ana, reluctant to touch her mind in case he found himself censured there. But her smile was as large as he knew her heart to be. He let himself reach out to her and absorbed her thoughts.

Spencer, you have no idea how just the right amount of jealousy, without hate or anger, makes me feel…well,…cherished. I never meant to hurt you. I only meant to help Hotch. Because you love him. You introduced us and showed me why you love him, so now I do, too. But you’re the only one who I’ll even begin to allow to have the notion of ‘ownership.’

Reid’s smile finally emerged. I know. Not being able to exercise at least a modicum of control over my reactions is new to me. I guess that’s because the doctor’s right: you’re my biggest, best present ever.

And you’re mine.

The old doctor chose that moment to discreetly take the coffeepot back to the kitchen, ostensibly to brew more. No matter how long he existed, he would never forget what it was like to be in love. While the young couple in his living room reaffirmed their commitment to each other and to helping their dearest friend, he thought of his long-gone Catherine.

And of jealousy, and of passion, and of how very messy life was when one lived it to its fullest.

Messy and indescribably wonderful.

xxxxxxx

When Rossi and Hotch took their seats among the others, the atmosphere was calmer than when they had left. But Hotch himself was clearly uncomfortable with the idea that his psyche was, once again, a way station for outsiders. All eyes were trained on him as he stared at the floor, still considering what he’d been told about his own mind.

After a moment’s observation, the old healer sighed, rose from his chair and moved to stand behind the Unit Chief. When he reached around and let one hand rest, spanning across the base of Hotch’s throat, everyone knew he was administering more than just a comforting touch. Hotch straightened, but didn’t resist. He knew this man would never hurt him. After a moment, he visibly relaxed, his shoulders releasing tension. His eyes lost their guarded look. He seemed to be watching some internal landscape. When a faint smile touched Hotch’s lips, the doctor echoed his expression, let his hand drop away, and stepped back.

“That’s all it is, Aaron. It’s only a wandering child who was lucky enough to find a kind stranger.”

Hotch nodded. He took a deep breath and the tension he’d let go, didn’t return.

“What was that all about?” Rossi couldn’t resist putting his own protective hand on his friend’s shoulder, reclaiming his own special bond. “What just happened?”

The doctor resumed his seat. “I showed Aaron what we’re up against. I let him feel that his intruder has no evil intent. In fact, no intent at all. Only instinct and innocence. And love. I let him feel its love.” He addressed Hotch directly. “There are no monsters inside you, son. This isn’t like last time.”

Reid and Ana were leaning forward, eagerness in both their eyes. “You showed him? Our child?”

The doctor nodded. “As I see it…yes.”

“Could we see her? Would you help us to see?” Ana’s questions held a note of pleading.

“No.” The flat refusal made both parents-to-be blink. “I’m sorry, but neither of you should ever access Aaron’s mind again. It will be necessary for you, empath, to do so one more time, but you’ll be supervised and, it will be the last time. And if we are successful and manage to coax the psychic aspect of your child out, I hope we can find a way to let this poor man enjoy the privacy and sanctity of being his mind’s sole occupant.”

“And just how are we supposed to accomplish this…coaxing?” Rossi wasn’t sure he would understand the answer, but as far as he was concerned, the sooner they implemented whatever plan the old physician had devised to meet their needs, the better. He couldn’t rid his mind of the doctor’s repeated statements that he had never encountered this situation before. Rossi was more than a little worried about what the next step would entail. And whether or not it would be successful.

“The best plans are simple. And I believe, based on our last experience together, that we can employ a variation of how the telepath called his ghosts home.”

Reid and Ana huddled closer together. Despite the outcome last time, those memories were not their fondest. This wasn’t a journey they wanted to repeat

Ana’s fingers interlaced with her husband’s.

Our child and our best friend are at stake, Spencer.

Let’s just hope we don’t have to choose one or the other.