Together Forever.

I'm Not Ready For This...

"Are you done?" Ethan asked concernedly, knocking on the bathroom door.

I finished up, spit, and flushed the toilet I had now become very well acquainted with.

"I'm good." I opened the door and smiled at him as I washed my hands. "Let's go to lunch now."

 "Nuh-uh." He frowned and shook his head. "We are taking you to a doctor first. This has been going on for two weeks now, and it's not getting better, babe."

I sighed. I guess it wouldn't have been so bad for me to go to the doctor; it obviously wasn't getting any better. I'd been regularly nauseous and throwing up every few days for the past three weeks. I could've sworn I had abs from all the tensing up they'd done.

"What if it's something serious?" I asked, walking back into my bedroom. "What if there is something wrong with me?" I put a hand over my stomach, which was still churning.

"Well, there is something wrong with you. I've been saying that for years." He joked, nudging my arm with his elbow. I didn't reply.

He cleared his throat. "Baby, I was just kidding. I bet nothing is wrong. The doctor will probably just give you some medicine. Do you want me to come with you?"

I shook my head. That was the last thing I wanted. I want to do this alone.

We sat next to each other in the waiting room, silent. A tall, blonde nurse with soft features and a warm expression called my name.

"I can do this. Just wait here," I said as I got up.

Ethan stood up as well and kissed me, squeezing my hand before he sat down again.

"I love you, and I'll be back soon. Try not to worry about me, okay?"

I followed the nurse through the hallway to a door at the end. She closed the door behind me.

"Okay. Let's see what's going on." She reached underneath the paper-covered bed and took out a faded blue hospital gown. The nurse handed it to me, obviously expecting me to change right in front of her. Yeah, right. Like that'll happen. I'm way too self conscious about my body.

 "I'll, um, I'll step out." She said, as she opened the door. "Knock when you're ready for me to come in again. Take off everything except your bra and underwear, if you're comfortable." The nurse looked at the ground and closed the door between us.

After taking off my shirt, I noticed a very bloated belly. I need to go on a diet. I'm gaining that weight back.

I took everything off except my bra, just like she told me, and put the gown on, tying a bow in the back. I knocked on the door.

The nurse walked back in and closed the door again. She asked me to lie down on my back on the bed. The paper crinkled and I positioned myself comfortably.

She used her fingers to put pressure on my belly. Something seemed to stir in her and she furrowed her eyebrows. "Um," she said. "I hope you don't mind a nurse doing this. We're a little short-staffed today and our doctors are treating those with appointments. The doctors usually don't have time treat walk-ins unless it's serious. And I think--" She explored my stomach a bit more and nodded. "We're going to give you a urine test. It shouldn't be anything too serious." The nurse smiled. "Why don't you get dressed?"

"Nothings wrong with me; just a stomach bug!" I cheered as I walked out to Ethan. He picked me up in his arms and spun me around.

"That's a relief. Lunch?" he winked as he led me out to the car.

"You're pregnant?" Alice shrieked, jumping up and down with a grin across her face.

I finished putting the dishes away and sat down on the dining room chair. 

"Why aren't you jumping with me?" She asked, still jumping. "This is amazing news!"

"Alice, he's leaving in a week. What am I going to do? If I tell him, he won't go," I groaned as I buried my face in my hands.

"Oh, you're right. What can we do?" Alice frowned and sat across from me.

I shrugged in reply. "Just keep it a secret until he gets back. Boot camp is only four months; I'll most definitely have a baby bump by then, but I can't tell him yet." I shook my head. I can't tell him before he goes. This will have to wait. I was already a month pregnant. When he got back I'd have a big five month old baby living inside me. This was so weird to think about. I--Marie--I was going to have a baby. I put my hands down to my belly and felt the bulge. There is a living human inside of me right now. I looked in the mirror at my stomach, a little bloated but not too bad. Ethan won't notice before he leaves. I thought it was my time of the month; I didn't think I could possibly be pregnant. I thought I just had a stomach bug.

I don't know if I'm ready for this.