baby girl | chanlix

twenty.

"Stop fucking ignoring me," Chan hissed out grabbing my arm as I left Mr. Lee's office. His grip on my writs hurt making my soar, scrapped wrist burn. 

"Let go of me, "I whined out tears burned in my eyes at the pain. His grip loosened but he wouldn't let go. 

"No, tell me why you've been avoiding me, "He hissed out. 

"NO," I yelled and yanked my hand away before running out of the school. I ran all the way home, my mom's car in the drive as I ran up the porch. 

Once again she was waisted. She slapped me and hit me and yelled things at me like normal. Once again I tucked her into her bed and left her Tylonal and water before making chicken noodle soup for her to eat when she wakes up. I went to my room and laid on my bed feeling pain in my chest. 

I took my sweatshirt off and looked down at the t-shirt I stole from Shenqiu when they came to visit last. It was an over-sized shirt on him, so I was practically drowning in it. It smelled like him but the smell was almost gone. The same thing was is happening with Johnny's sweatshirt it's losing the calming scent they left behind. 

I pulled the shirt up and over my head as I stood in front of my mirror and saw bruises on my whole upper torso. My waist and ribs were bruised the worst. My back had scratched all over it all of them burning. 

My neck had a few handprints around it. My right cheek had a gash in it and a handprint to match my neck. 

My darkroom was illuminated by lightning outside. I pulled my shirt back on and called into school saying that I wouldn't be in for a week or so. Everyone was okay with this because they heard a higher voice on the other side of the phone so it had to be Mrs. Lee right? No, it was me her son. 

I heard knocking on the front door and ignored it. The rain outside started coming down harder and the thunder rumbled the room as lightning lit it up.

The knocks got harder and harder but were covered up with the next rumble of the Lord's stomach, he must have skipped lunch like me.

I pulled Johnny's hoodie on and sprayed it with the cologne he uses. I ran downstairs in the hoodie and shorts that were covered by the large hoodie. The hood pulled up and my hair messed up. My eyes are droopy from sadness but to anyone else I just look tired. 

I opened the door and saw Jeongin standing on my porch."Hi, lix," he said and walked in."It smells nice in here," he said.

"What do you want Jeongin, "I asked.

"Oh, yeah," Jeongin said seeming to have almost forgotten why he was here, "Well Chan won't leave us alone and keeps texting Chanwoo, Seungmin, and me," he said."Why don't you respond to him," he asked.

"I blocked him and his friends," I said and sat on the couch pulling my legs under the sweatshirt holding them to my chest. 

"I need to study, so can you leave now that you told me that, "I asked. He looked almost hurt but the expression soon left and he smiled at me before leaving. I saw him run across the road from the window next to the door. 

I stood back up and jogged back upstairs and closed my blinds so no light from the lightning entered the room and turned on the fairy lights that were strung up around my room. 

I took my phone off the charger and sat in the middle of my floor. I texted my friends from Australia to see what they were all doing. 

SHEEN
I ain't doing shit

oH dAdDy
same

Minghoe
I just got home after classes

Hannie
helping Joshua at the cafe

Qiu
crying with Lulu watching movies

Lulu and Snitch
Don't expose me like that bitch

My Anime bf
winwin's teachin' me to cook without it starting on fire

Bacon
cuddling with yeollie

yoda the yeollie
crying because shenqiu and luhan are over and we're watching some sad shit

mr.can'ttellmyfriendsapart
drinkin' coffee at this cute shop in Seoul

Felicked
bitch what you doin' in Seoul
why didn't i hear about this before now
i'm goin' out where you at

mr.can'ttellmyfriendsapart
Red Velvet Ice Cream Palor or some shit like that

Felicked
bitch i'm on my way

I got up and grabbed the car keys and door through the harsh rain to the cafe. I got there and parked in front before running in.

I saw Sehun in the back booth that I normally sit in and ran over to it before sitting next to him kissing his cheek. 

"Hey Sehunnie," I said and threw my arms around his shoulders. He holds me and I feel the frustration and sadness push out in the form of tears and I break down. 

"Shh, it's okay baby, it's okay," he said and held me tighter as I sobbed into his jacket. 

He pulled me onto his lap and slowly rocked back and forth trying to calm me down. Isn't it sad that the first time I see him in months the first thing I do is cry.

"Take me back to Australia with you, I don't want to be here anymore, "I cried pulling away from his shoulder. 

"I don't want to be here anymore, take me away, "I said, take me away before I lose myself. I didn't say the second part out loud. Have I gotten better since I lived in Australia? Yes, I have but now I'm relapsing again, darker than before.

Joy came over with his bill and smiled weakly at me. I looked at her with teary eyes and smiled back but it didn't reach my eyes. It must have looked forced, extremely forced because the look on her face before she left was pity filled.

He put a bill down and I latched onto him as he picked me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist and clung like a koala. 

He held me tight as he opened his umbrella for the short walk to my car. He placed me in the passenger seat and got into the driver's seat to drive me home.

He knew the way. He parked and got his umbrella out again before getting out and picking me out of the seat taking me inside the house.

He walked up the stairs and into my room and shut the door as I continued to cry. He sat me down on the bed and held my face in his hands looking at me in the eyes as tears rolled down my hot cheeks. 

Sehun leaned close to my face and kissed my cheeks and then hugged me before standing up."I'll make you some tea," he said and left the room leaving me with the shadows. 

 They closed in on me as I pulled the sweatshirt tighter around me and the hood farther around my head.