baby girl | chanlix

twenty-five.

Trigger Warning
Verbal Abuse

Chan started crying."I'm sorry for all the things I've done, I was playing with your feelings and on the way, I caught some, I like you, no love you, Felix," he said looking up at Felix with glassy eyes.  

Felix pushed Chan's head onto the grass softly and said, "Chan, your drunk, you don't mean anything you say," and with that, he pushed Chan's soft hair off his forehead and placed a soft kiss on his head before getting up. An Uber was on its way to pick him up and take him home. 

The Uber arrived and the small Australian boy got in the car. The words of the older ringing through his ears. He smiled at the driver slightly before getting out of the car. His mom was home, she was drunk and started yelling at him. 

felix

"You worthless child, you went to a party and got yourself laid, you look like a fucking slut, why don't you die already," she screamed.  

My heart, that is already in pain from Chan's words, broke even more. One person says they love me and another say that they don't, what's the truth? Is anyone even telling the truth, or are they all lying to me. 

Do my hyung's in Australia love me? Have they ever loved me or do they just feel bad for me? Does Sehun hyung even care, or is he just pretending. 

"Why are you crying, does the truth hurt," she screamed. I ran up to my room and locked the door behind me as I slide down the door. I sobbed. My body shook. My head spinning. My mind screaming. The darkness in the room consumed me. 

I wanted to scream but my throat closed. All that came out were strangled whimpers. I stood up and leaned on the wall as my legs shook. I moved over to my desk and turned on the fairy lights hanging in my room. 

I wabbled over to my bed but my legs gave out on the way. I was drunk, but I didn't touch any alcohol. I was drunk on my own sadness, I was drunk on my pain, I was drunk on other hatred for me. 

I curled up on the plush rug and held my legs to my chest as I shook. My eyes welled with tear once again and I sobbed into the twinkling room. My phone rang but I couldn't pull myself out of the fetal position. 

Pain erupted in my head, pain shooting from the back of my head, the front, from all sides. My limbs felt numb and my tear burned my skin. 

I felt like I was drowning, maybe I was, maybe I was drowning in sadness, in my tears. Everything was muffled, life seemed to slow down. The sun seemed to take days to finally rise. My legs still numb refused to stand. I crawled into the bed and decided I was going to sleep for eternity. 

***sorry it's short but, thank you so much for 36K, I never imagined anyone would be interested in this book, so thank you all. I know this book is taking an angsty turn, but it will get happier soon***