Jaded

[25] The Beetles and the Bees

 "I honestly thought that would be more enlightening," I whisper as Atty slowly closes Professor Cotreau's office door behind him. He stifles a laugh and brings a finger to his pursed lips, making a half-hearted 'shush' sound.

Once we've turned the corner of the hallway, Atty bursts out laughing. "You thought Flynn would be mind-blowing? The guy's idea of familial bonding includes bribery," he cackles.

I bite my lips, trying my very best to hold back a grin. "Bribery that you actively participate in, Atticus."

He shrugs, rolling his shoulders. "They're not my family. I'm allowed to bribe."

I shake my head, sighing as we exit the faculty building. I should've expected a certain level of pomp and arrogance from Cotreau, the man's a hotshot in academia after all. But c'mon, how many times am I expected to hear about the same boring expedition and coo with praise as if he's Marco Polo? It's not like machetes were involved at any point.

I sigh again. "At least he knows his stuff. And if anything, that office was insane- I could spend all year in there."

Though Flynn's space was small (an 8 by 6 box unfitting of a department head), it was cozy. Heavy set furniture sat comfortably on a thick Prussian blue rug, covering almost every available inch. And the walls, they were adorned floor to ceiling with beautifully preserved specimens of beetles.

It must be true what they say, the average animal is a beetle. Gorgeous, gorgeous beetle.

When my gaze wanders to Atty, his mouth is hanging open, eyes wide. "You liked that hideous office?!"

I gasp, making my offense clear. My beetles are not hideous. They're perfect.

"On the walls, there were..." Atty trails off, dramatically shivering, "Ick." He even has the audacity to fake gag. "So many," he whispers.

Quickening my pace on the main campus walkway, I scoff. "Actually, beetles are-"

"Nope," Atty clicks his tongue, "I'm not getting into an argument about bugs. I know when I'm outclassed."

"So you admit defeat?" I smile, glancing at him. There's something incredibly fulfilling about having my absurd beetle expertise finally acknowledged.

Outclassed, I like the sound of that.

Atty nods as he swings open the passenger side door of the car. Once I slide in, he chuckles as he rests his elbow against the roof and leans in.

"Of course your highness, none can defeat you," he drawls, displaying what has to be the absolute worst wink in history.

When he slips into the driver's side, he's still continuing his bit. "What can I, a measly insect fool, do in the face of your terrifying knowledge?"

I playfully shove his arm, sticking out my tongue. At least he got the fool part right. I'm completely in the mood to tease him right back, but he's already pulled onto the main road.

Before he can make a left for the hotel I've booked us in, I ask, "can we stop by Wal-Mart? I need to pick up a few things."

Really, I only need one thing for my experiment- a waxing kit. Since I was astute enough to bring the right clothing but forgot completely to prep these legs.

Atty gestures for me to put it in the GPS and thankfully it turns out we're only a few minutes away. When we make it inside, I brainstorm about a thousand ways to get rid of him so I can shop in peace. Maybe if I send him to the clothing section under some kind of a pretense....

Atty scoffs and shakes his head. "No way, I know that look. You can't get rid of me, not after last time."

Last time? Oh right, ha, when I tried to ditch him. Fun times.