Pan [Lost Boy Series #2]

✶Internal Crisis✶

    No. No. No, just no. In all of my life I would've never expected to be in college classes with him.

    Throwing myself face first onto my bed, I took a mini pillow and screamed as loud as I could into it- and these weren't good screams either. My emotions had become overwhelming, putting a weight on my shoulders like never before. There was no way that I would be able to take the emotional burden of being around him again. It was all too much for me to handle once more.

    Reminiscing on the time he had left years ago, I had felt shocked by his sudden departure. He may not have noticed it, but he was the only human being on this whole entire planet that had affected my life as much as he did. And because of that one fact, it made his departure all the more detrimental.

    Heartbroken, I was a thin piece of glass that chipped away every day he was gone. He was my oxygen supply, without him I was suffocating on the burdens of this earth. 'I was only a teenager, a stupid teenager' I would constantly remind myself. However, it didn't change the fact that I had felt lonely once again and along with that also followed the fact that I had felt slightly betrayed.

    Sitting on my bed, feelings of anger arose with me. He could've prevented this. All of this! He could've just stayed or maybe sent someone else to help me. Or maybe, just maybe he should've never came to me at all. Rationalizing the situation, I let out a sigh.

    Now I was being selfish. It wasn't the poor guy's intention to make me fall for him. Quite frankly, he never even knew that I had once loved him. What was a girl to do? I couldn't help but melt at the way his green eyes excitedly lit up when something caught his attention, or the way he preferred vanilla over chocolate. Besides, who could resist a poptart-loving boy?

    Throwing myself backwards on my bed, tears flowed from my eyes. Stupid hormones, always acting up when I'm going through an internal crisis. Let's keep it real Laney- he's here for Thomas, not for you. Then he's going to leave once again, and this will all start over once again.

    Just thinking about this whole process was exhausting. Wiping the tears of frustration off my face, I stood up and took a glance in the mirror. Taking a glance at myself, I couldn't help but laugh. How pathetic of me to cry over a boy that I fell for in high school. I am a grown woman in college, I shouldn't be crying for any guy.

    On the other hand, man he had changed a lot. The boy had changed from lean and lanky to muscular and manly. As if he wasn't attractive before, he was nearly irresistible now. His jawline looked like it could cut diamonds!

    As if on cue, my phone began to ring. Swiftly running to pick it up, I almost tripped over a bra that had fallen on the floor. Sighing, I answered the phone. "Hello?"

    "Oooo you do have your ringer on! I'm so proud of you boo!" Replied Jenna through the phone. Letting out an unenthusiastic sigh, she continued to chat.

    "So I looked up times for the movie and I found a showing for tonight!"

    "Uh-about that," I hesitated.

    "Really Lane? Bailing on me already?"

    "No, no. Nothing like that, it's just-"

    "Did you get sick or something? You sound stuffy."

"No I-"

"Allergies?"

"No, Jenna," I said a little more snippy than I intended for it to come out. As silence greeted me from the other end, I could tell she was irritated from the tone of voice I used with her.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to be feisty. It's just...I'm going through this crisis right now."

"You seemed fine in class today," she replied with a bit of an attitude.

"Well I ran into a bit of trouble."

"What kind of trouble?" She asked.

"Well...there's this guy..."

"Wait, what? A guy? Laney Riverdale with a guy? But you were literally just telling me that you weren't interested in anyone."

"I know, I know..."

"Laney," she sighed. "I know this might be a touchy subject but did you just take...a test?"

"A test? Like a pregnancy test?"

"Yeah....," she hesitated.

"No, nothing like that!" I laughed.

Letting out a sigh of relief on the other end, she chuckled, "Oh, thank goodness. I was going to have to beat some sense into you!"

As we both chuckled, Jenna asked. "So what's the problem?"

"Long story? You want to bring food and have a girls' night at my house? I'll explain everything."

"Yes! Sounds fun! Send me the address and I'll bring food and my pajamas!" She replied over excitedly.

Poor girl. She didn't know what she just got herself into.

© Lightning_Stryker 2016